The Other Kind Of Classics - 6 - Sheshnaag

"The Other Kind Of Classics" presents one of the all time classics! If you ever want to see just one of these movies, this is it!!
 
The name: Sheshnaag
Actors: Jeetendra, Rishi Kapoor, Rekha, Danny, Madhavi and Mandakini.

Story: Aghoori (Danny) wants the ichchadhari Naag-Nagin pair of Pritam (Jeetendra) and Banu (Madhavi) desperately.
Bcoz every lunar eclipse they reveal a trove of immense wealth and power - more powerful than the Gods!
 
Meanwhile, in a small village far, far away, we have Rekha whose father dies. She is left with a foul hubby (Anupam Kher) and
innocent brother (Rishi Kapoor). Bhola loves animals. He can charm any animal with his flute. He saves the nagin (Banu) and hence
is hated by Aghoori and his henchmen.
Meanwhile Rekha suffers a Draupadi fate. Anupam loses her in a wager, and she is surrounded by men wanting to sexually assault her.
So she jumps off a cliff. Banu takes her form and comes back to take care of Bhola. They move into a palatial mansion.
Pritam joins as a servant so he can be close to his wife and help look after Bhola.

Now Bhola falls in love with Kamini (Mandakini) and undergoes training to make a strong man of himself. This training is classic in itself!
But how will these guys stop Aghoori?

Fantastic dialogue of all time:
Aghoori on the origins/chemical composition of his power:
"Aghoori ki srushti Shaitan ne ki hai!
1000 Shaitanon ko mar kar, shamshan ghat mein jalakar, ek raakh tayyar kiya gaya.
Us raakh ko 1000 chipkaliyon ke khoon mein gholkar, ek putala tayyar kiya gaya.
Aur uss putle ko magarmach ke khaal se dhak diya gaya.
Aur uske haathon aur paaon ke jagah bichoon ke dankh laga diye gaye.
Aur uske baad Aghori paida hua!"


The entire movie is available on YouTube.

Finally, we leave you with proof that Alpenliebe stole their "Kaisi jeebh laplapayee" ad concept from Sheshnaag.
Enjoy this song - I am not responsible if your stomach pains with laughter!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mzAR7ZdIaN4

The Other Kind Of Classics - 5 - Mr. Prime Minister

"The Other Kind of Classics" presents "Mr. Prime Minister"!

Dev Anand made many wonderful, memorable movies. But then he kept on making a ton of trash ones. Even Jewel Thief was not spared with a hideous sequel called "The return of Jewel Thief". Blow by blow, Dev saab painstakingly dismantled the temple he had created.

But I digress. When life gives you lemons, make lemonade. So it is with this "movie" called "Mr Prime Minister". Enjoy it!

The story - cough, cough! is as follows:

Kutch earthquake survivor Johnny Master (Dev saab) sells newspapers for a living in a small village in Gujarat. Residents of the village form a new political party and make Johnny their candidate. He wins, his opponents kidnap him. After being tortured, Johnny regains his memory to discover that he is Prem Batra, the third richest Indian in the UK! On the day of his arrival in Kutch, he had become a victim of the earthquake.  Johnny busts corrupt politicians and becomes India's prime minister.

The scene below shows Johnny watching 9/11 disaster happening from some unknown hotel window.

Points to be noted in just this one scene:

1. Ranchi waala aircrash bhi 9/11 ko hua tha.

2. As many extras as possible were crammed into the room.
3.  There is a naked guy among the shocked onlookers.

4. A plane crashing into a building must create a mushroom cloud, because it looks exactly like an atom bomb.

5. Dev Saab and Ex-NYC mayor Rudy Giuliani were buddies.
6. Rudy got a check for $1 million from Dev saab. He never quite recovered from this shock and became the raving lunatic Trump supporter that he is today.

7. The lady casually donated blood for *all* the ghayal log in the WTC towers. Manmohan Desai had nothing on her!

https://youtu.be/hkSU-YSYeZI

The Other Kind Of Classics - 4 - Zehreela

"The Other Kind of Classics" is back!

When is a remake not a remake?

When it has been remade in such a way that it takes a life of its own or  irreparably mangles the original!

We proudly present the latter - "Zehreela" starring the one and only Prabhuji urf Mithun da!

Mithun is one actor on whom an entire series of Classics can be written! Throughout his career he has acted in funtastic, crazy films. Classic satisfaction guaranteed in each and every one of them.

In Zehreela, which is an unimaginable remake of "Cape Fear", Mithun has done numerous action scenes, each worth its weight in gold. One of them is a "non-veg" action scene where chicken is literally the bone of contention. Watch, ye mere mortals, as Mithun da pulverizes the goons and turns them into kadhai chicken!

https://youtu.be/R7sGEAC_1Fc

The Other Kind Of Classics - 3 - Andaz (Anil Juhi)

Teachers' Day Special!
The Other Kind Of Classics  presents - "Andaz"!
Teacher: Anil Kapoor
Student: Karishma Kapoor
Wife: Juhi Chawla

A 2nd level remake of a South Indian movie (Tamil remade into Telugu remade into Hindi), the plot is simple. A student (Karishma) falls in love with her teacher (Anil). The teacher rebuffs her and she vows to marry him. Scared, he marries an illiterate (Juhi).

Karishma is mortified by what she has put Anil through. So she tries to improve Juhi - education, manners, etc. wise. Matters get complicated when Karishma moves in with them after her father dies.

But the real reason why this is a classic because this is a combined skeleton in both Anil and Juhi's closets!
Both of them have not done anything cheap in their careers. Except here.
Since it is a David Dhawan film, cheapness is guaranteed. So also here there are 2 songs with double meaning.
"Khada hai khada hai .... Dar pe tere Aashiq khada hai"
And
"Mein maal gaadi tu dhakka laga". What poetry!

Presenting one of the daags on the chaands (Juhi and Anil).
Please see when alone.

https://youtu.be/9pDOSg2IBGs

The Other Kind Of Classics - 2 - Jiyaala

The Other Kind Of Classics proudly presents - "Jiyaala"!
This hidden classic has remained hidden for a reason. Actually 2 reasons. The hero and the heroine.

Hero: Siraj Khan. Such powerful expression - one. Used throughout the movie for all scenes.

Heroine: Poonam Jhawer: Such a wasted talent. Just look at her eyes! Kya nahin that uske paas? Naysayers say kuch nahin tha. But we ignore such ignoramuses.

Bonus: This song, blasted out by Kumar Sanu. If you can tolerate it, see from 4:07 to 4:18. Such expressions have never been seen on the silver screen. And God willing, will never be seen again.

https://youtu.be/6a6eC-9BDZQ

The Other Kind of Classics - 1 - Meri Awaaz Suno

This is a series of post which lists films that are "the other kind of classics". These are basically films that are so bad that you like them! Sounds contradictory, but that's the way it is.

First example is the great Jeetendra doing a fantastic double role in "Meri Awaaz Suno".
One good cop, and the other an apparently bad one called Kanwarlal.

Admire the genius of Jeetendra as he tries to play the 2 characters as differently as possible...

https://youtu.be/l1CMo_qvu8c?t=2m25s

Diary Notes from my child's school

"Please send 4 onions, 2 karelas and a brinjal with your child next Monday."

The note. The dreaded diary note from school.

You have just come home from office, and are chatting with your better half and the little one. Somewhere in the conversation, the kid casually says "Oh BTW, there is a note in my diary. Teacher has asked parents to read it."

The conversation stops. My better half and I look at each other, trying to keep a poker face. But internally there is churning. As Spider Man would say, "My spider sense is tingling!"

With trembling hands, we open the school diary. Pinned with a stapler pin is an innocuous looking small white piece of paper. On it are typed the latest instructions to parents - kind of like the mafia boss instructing his minions to do his bidding. Disobedience is not an option. Consequences will be severe.

This note has a sequence of instructions, akin to a complex puzzle.
"Next Thursday there will be a monthly competition."
(Me): Ok, no probs.

"Your child has to make a pen stand."
(Me): So far, so good.

"The materials have to be found at home."
(Me): Oh oh.

"The density of the materials sent must be between 0.69 to 2.7 grams per cubic centimeter."
(Me): Google!!!

"Sketch pens allowed but minimal usage recommended. Glitter can be used maximum of 5 dots per square cm. Natural colors preferred."
(Me): I should send turmeric and red chilli powder. Maybe dhaniya powder and garam masala. Ekdum natural.

And so on.

Sometimes you have to make charts (healthy food VS junk food).
Sometimes you are made to rummage around the streets like a crazy person (find stones that are rhombus shaped).

Sometimes you visit 20 costume rental shops (Armadillo costume kidhar milta hai bhai?)

You gather all the required materials, and send it with your sweetie.

At the end of the day you ask, "So what did you make with it?"
Sweetie: "Oh, Fantasia Luktuke from my class got a lot of material from her parents, so we used that only. I kept mine aside."
(Me): $#@*#$@$!

We finished our education without our parents having to even bother what went on in our class. Here I am getting a second, forced childhood. I am learning things I don't want to learn. Any of the parents can pass the school exam tomorrow, because we know their syllabus by heart.

What cannot be cured, must be endured.

The weekend approaches. Bliss will be mine!!

Sweetie: "Oh Daddy, another diary note!"
(Me): Spider  sense ....

Note: "Please grow fungus on bread, paper, grass and cow dung. Each must be watered and studied every 2 hours. All materials must be sent on Monday."
(Me): Sweetie, how much fungus can Fantasia Luktuke's parents grow?

Movie Review: Kick

Summary: Go watch it!!

Saw Salman's "Kick" recently. This turned out to be yet another "paisa vasool" movie from Sallu Bhai! Keeps you entertained throughout, if you don't demand that logic is a necessary part of a film.

Story: Salman (Devi Lal Singh) is a daredevil who gets a "kick" in life by doing risky things.

Salman meets Jacqueline (Shaina) and they fall for each other. But he can't keep a steady job as it becomes too boring. So they break off.

Cut to a spate of robberies where the thief is always ahead of the police. Using a prototype mask discarded by Hritik in Krrish, and a "mark" discarded by Hritik in Dhoom 2, the thief robs truckloads of money. It turns out later that the thief is none other than - hold your breath - Salman (gasp)!

Randeep Hooda is after the thief - named "Devil". He also falls in love with Jacqueline.
But Jacqueline to Salman ni! Her heart still belongs to Sallu Bhai.

Randeep figures out that "Devil" is actually Devi+L of Devi Lal Singh, thus achieving a major breakthrough for all mankind.

In between there is a brief cameo by Nawazuddin Siddiqui as a demented greedy head of a Medical empire, with a corrupt Chacha as minister to boot. These become Sallu's enemies.

Many twists and turns later, the inevitable happens. Sallu wins - everything.

There are some good action and chase scenes in the movie.

Salman does what he does best - entertainment, entertainment, entertainment!
Jacqueline is passable, although her accent needs work.
Randeep is good and holds his own throughout.

Mithun da as Salman's father is, as usual, solid gold. (Koi shaq?)

Nawazuddin is good but has a smaller role than he deserved.
Archana Pooran Singh goes over the top in her portrayal of Sallu's mother. Saurabh Shukla is good as Jacqueline's dad.

Wasted was Byomkesh Bakshi (Rajit Kapur). So also was Sanjay Mishra. Both deserved more.

Book Review: The Salvation of a Saint

Is it possible to kill someone from hundreds of miles away?

This is the fundamental question that Detective Galileo (Yukawa, who is actually a professor of Physics) has to answer.

Intriguing? Definitely. 

This installment of the Detective Galileo series from Keigo Higashino may not match the masterpiece ("The Devotion of Suspect X"), but it is also very good nonetheless.

The plot is simple. 
Yoshitaka was on the verge of divorcing his wife. He is poisoned by coffee spiked with arsenic and dies. The most logical suspect is naturally his wife, Ayane. However, there is a glitch. Ayane was hundreds of miles away when he was murdered. 

Yoshitaka was not a saint. He had other women in his life at various times, and had treated them badly. That includes Yoshitaka's mistress. But none of those suspects is as strong on motive as Ayane. But her (lack of) opportunity to commit the act at the fatal hour is a major obstacle for the investigators.

To add to this, the lead detective (Kusanagi) unfortunately falls for the prime suspect . He just refuses to believe that she could have had anything to do with the crime. 

However, his assistant, a lady by the name of Kaoru Utsumi, thinks exactly the opposite. Her woman's intuition tell her to go after Ayane, even if the facts don't support her theory.So she does what her boss has done for years when stymied—she calls upon Professor Manabu Yukawa.

Yukawa and Kusanagi had damaged their relationship during the previous case ("Devotion ..."), and are not on speaking terms. But Utsumi's interference forces them to work together again. And being thorough professionals, they do that quite well.

Higashino follows his tried-and-tested method of hiding everything in plain sight. When the end is revealed, you might end up kicking yourself for not guessing the plot.

Book Review: The devotion of Suspect X

This is not a "who"dunnit. It is a "how-was-it" dunnit. 
You know the crime, and the criminals. What you don't know is how the crime was covered up. 
The author hides everything in plain sight, and does a wonderful job of it.

The story begins innocuously, with the central characters (Tetsuya Ishigami and Yasuko Hanaoka) going about their normal routine.
Yasuko Hanaoka is a divorced, single mother who works at a restaurant that delivers packed meals. She has a daughter called Misato.
Ishigami is a very intelligent Mathematics teacher. He is a next-door neighbor of Yasuko and Misato.

One day Togashi (Yasuko's loser ex-husband) shows up at Yausko's apartment to extort money from her. He threatens to keep doing this and to intrude in their lives. The situation quickly goes out of hand, and Togashi is killed by mother and daughter.
Ishigami overhears the noises, and puts 2 and 2 together. He offers his help in taking care of everything - including getting rid of the body and also covering up the crime.

Inevitably the body turns up and is identified. Kusanagi (the detective investigating the murder case) starts looking at Yasuko as the obvious suspect. He tries to poke holes in her alibi but is unable to do so. 

Kusanagi frequently (unofficially) consults with Dr. Manabu Yukawa, a physicist and his college friend. Yukawa and Ishigami are also batch mates from the same college.

Yukawa initally does not suspect Ishigami and he only meets him to catch up with his old friend. But slowly Yukawa is convinced that Ishigami is not just an innocent witness. 
Then we are treated to a battle of wits, where Ishigami tries to protect Yasuko and Yukawa tries to unravel the layers of deceit and get at the truth.

In the end, Yukawa does decipher what happened. He is awestruck by Ishigami's devotion which even surpasses his considerable intelligence.


The prose isn't very elegant - probably because this is a translation from a Japanese novel. But it doesn't matter. The substance more than makes up for the lack of style.

My favorite quote from the book:
"Sometimes, all you had to do was exist in order to be someone's savior."

Movie Review: Race 2

Summary: Even if you keep your brain aside, your head will still hurt while watching it!! :-)

Details:

Arman Mallik (John Abraham) is a ruthless rich creep who only loves money and can do anything to get it. His partner-in-crime is Elena (Deepika), who also happens to be his step sister. He was a street fighter and still fights whenever required.

Ranveer Singh (Saif) is out to get revenge on John (for what is revealed later). He takes the help of Anil Kapoor to achieve this. The entire movie is about how the revenge is taken.

Omisha (Jacqueline Fernandez) is John's girl friend, and has her own agenda. Anil's secretary is Amisha Patel, who only motto in life seems to talk about carnal pleasures. There is also Aditya Panscholi as Godfather Anza. Anza wears dark glasses all the time, presumably because he too does not want to see where the story is heading ...

The plot is wafer-thin. There are the usual twists and turns galore. But while they were enjoyable in the Race, in Race 2 they seem to be put in there forcibly. Also the twists can be seen from a mile away, so the punch is lost.

Abbas Mastan have tried so hard to make this entertaining that they have lost sight of the fact that a story is also needed. So we are treated to an continuous parade of mansions, discotheques, yachts, casinos, etc. There is a lot of skin show - with all the 3 ladies in a "race" for the top slot.

There are many unintentional hilarious scenes in the film - playing cards in high stakes poker being changed digitally due to "micro sensors" fitted in them, Jacqueline's attempts at fencing, John's attempts at acting.

But the icing on the cake is a car being driven out of an aeroplane, and then landing safely because 4 parachutes pop up from the upper 4 corners of the car!! "Allah Duhai hai" is right!! A miracle!!

Saif is competent. Deepika delivers a good performance. But both of them fight a lost cause (the film).

John Abraham proves once more that you can get by in Bollywood without acting, so long as you maintain your good looks. Ditto for Jacqueline.

John wears a constipated wooden expression most of the time, even when fighting.

Anil Kapoor is wasted in delivering perhaps the most lame, vulgar and cheesy dialogues in his entire career. Amisha has a limited role, and you thank your lucky stars for that.

There are some good, some "classic" (the other kind) and vulgar dialogues.

Good

"Dilchaspi kisi na kisi tarah nazar aa hi jaati hai"

Classic (the other kind)

• Jacqueline:  "Men are many, but money is money"  (profound)
• Deepika: Agar life ka one third hissa sokar ki guzarna hai ... toh akele hi kyun (even more profound)
• Anil: Sabar ka phal meetha hota hai, aur usse bhi zyada meetha hota hai ... sabere ka phal
  
• Jacqueline: Aaj tak kisne mujhe is tarah choone ki koshish nahi ki
  Saif: Bura laga toh bata deti
  Jacqueline: Meine yeh kab kaha ki bura laga?

Vulgar

Pretty much all of Anil Kapoor - Amisha Patel ones.

See it if you don't want a story, and are happy with glamour / attempted glamour.

Life of Pi - Review

I found it to be a visual spectacle worth seeing. Ang Lee has used the 3D medium fantastically and created a treat for our eyes.

Do not see it in 2D - 3D is the only way to go.

The story is interesting as well. I had not read the book beforehand, so had gone in with a clean slate.

The story is told in flashback mode by the senior Pi Patel (Irrfan Khan). When he was young, Pi is introduced to multiple religions, and his experiences help him later in his life. This does not go too well with his "rational" father, but he does not get in his son's way and keeps on teaching him useful things anyway.

The main story happens on sea. When going with his family to Canada on a freighter, the ship hits a freak storm and starts to sink. Pi manages to clamber aboard a lifeboat, with a tiger (called "Richard Parker") who also survives.

Pi's epic 227 day struggle for survival in the ocean, with just a tiger  for company changes him drastically. What he experiences takes him closer to God, and the whole philosophy of the "nature" of God.

The new actor, Suraj Sharma, has done a very good job. His interaction with the (CGI) tiger, are the "meat" of the film. Some are funny, some are intense. The tiger has been captured extremely well and makes you feel that he is almost human - lovable at times, and frighteningly predatory at others.

There is a heavy dose of spirituality, esp. in the beginning and end of the film. Some may like it, some might not.

We are told another story about the same sea saga later. Nobody is sure whether the 1st one is correct, or the 2nd one, a mixture of both, or none of them happened. But the beauty is that it doesn't matter.

The main reason for recommending this film is Ang Lee's direction and fantastic use of 3D. The colors in India and the ocean are shown vividly. There is an extremely effective representation of the storm  - water is tricky to get right in 3D, but Ang Lee has mastered it here. The tiger is shot very well - a combination of (supposedly) 4 Royal Bengal tigers and CGI effects. The luminescent shots of the waters at night, and the whale arising majestically out of the water. All will stay in your mind long after the movie ends.

See it just for Ang Lee's craft. If the story gets to you, it is a bonus.

Rating: 4.5/5

Movie Review – Raaz 3 (Hindi)

A movie that is a worthy successor to “Haunted”! The category is not pure horror, but “entertainment” horror.  If you are looking for classical horror movies, don’t see this one. But if you like the “other type of classic” movies – ones that you can look back on and say “I survived this one”, then this is for you.

Story Summary:

Not much. A fading movie star Shanaya Shekhar (Bipasha Basu) wants to ruin a rising one - Sanjana Krishna (Esha Gupta) to become number 1 again. When “normal” means fail, she resorts to taking the help of black magic. A film director Aditya Arora (Emran Hashmi) who is in love with Shanaya and owes her his career becomes an unwilling accomplice in making the black magic work on Sanjana. In the process, he (naturally) falls in love with Sanjana and tries to help her.

Vikram Bhatt throws the kitchen sink at the audience in trying to scare them. Unfortunately, the sink has rotted and rusted and the only danger that it can pose is a case of tetanus. The film’s attempts at ghoulishness remind you of Ramsay brothers. Blood running out of taps, grotesque creepy characters making “Grudge” like noises, a slimy creature moving around, you name it and the film has it. Vikram even throws in Ganapati Bappa as a last resort (in the hope that maybe He will be able to salvage the story).

The central theme of the movie is that an evil spirit – Tara Dutt (Manish Choudhary) gives Shanaya some magic water that will help possess Sanjana’s spirit. The water has to be given to her by someone she trusts. Since the corner stone of the movie is so corny, you know what to expect.

In keeping with the Bhatt tradition, Vikram has thrown in a lot of erotic scenes. However, they are pretty badly written and directed and so fail to make much of an impact. The music of the film is surprisingly below par for a Bhatt film.

The dialogues of this film definitely deserve an award. Samples:

·         “Science jism ko janta hai, aatma ko nahi” (reminding the audience that Bips starred in Jism)

·         “Yeh meri jagah hai, Bhagwan ki nahi” (reminds you of your boss)

·         “Ek raaz tumhare andar bhi hai...ek raaz mere andar bhi hai jo tumhe kahin ka nahi chodega” (I know what you ate last night)

·         “Jo khak se aya hai vo khak me mil jata hai” (reminds you of what the film will become)

And the award goes to:

v  “If you love me, you can be stupid for me” (intended for the audience?)

What works for the film is the slickness in direction and the performances.

Vikram Bhatt has a good command over the medium and his direction is slick. The 3-D effects deserve a special mention for being quite good.

Esha gives a decent performance (when she is not shrieking). For a newcomer, she has managed to hold her own quite well.

Manish Choudhary gives a good try at being an evil spirit. He is handicapped by the screen play. When you have to make growling noises while alternating between a maggot infested look and a flour-dosed one, it kind of handicaps you. But he tries manfully and does succeed to a large extent.

Emran gives a good performance as usual (when he is not in the mandatory erotic scenes). His acting has grown better by leaps and bounds. He portrays Aditya as a very human character who becomes an unwilling accomplice and then tries to back out after he realizes what it actually is doing to Sanjana.

Bipasha is also good in this movie. She also struggles with having to spout corny dialogues and the forced evil laughter. But otherwise she conveys the intensity of the character and the emotions that drive her pretty well. She is one of the highlights of the film.

In short, see this for entertainment. If you are looking for a classic ghoulish movie, this is not it :-).

Book Review: Dongri To Dubai – Six Decades of the Mumbai Mafia

Book Review: Dongri To Dubai – Six Decades of the Mumbai Mafia  by S. Hussain Zaidi

This is a niche book. It is only for those interested in the underworld, and the stories that lie within their murky world.

The book is like an encyclopedia of crime in Mumbai, right from India’s independence to the current times.  

As expected, Dawood Ibrahim is the “star” and gets maximum coverage. But there are a lot of other criminals that are listed here. Some of the characters are well known - Haji Mastan, Varadarajan Mudaliar, Chhota Rajan, Arun Gawali, Chhota Shakeel, Abu Salem, etc. have been mentioned in various media at one point of time or the other.

But some were totally unknown to me before I read this book.  Sometimes the book resembles the Mahabharata in the sheer number of people mentioned. This can get quite boggling. But once you get past that you start appreciating the research that forms the backbone of the book.

There are many facts that are already known to the reader – through papers, and especially films. But Zaidi reveals some unknown ones that shed an interesting light on some of the subjects.  E.g. that the mastermind behind the killing of Dawood’s brother Sabir was apparently an avid James Hadley Chase reader and that the actual murder plan was inspired by Chase’s novels.

The book is fast paced, and does not slow down even a little bit. Nor does it feel boring anywhere.

Bollywood has had an unending romance with the underworld and has tended mostly to glorify its inhabitants. This book does no such thing. Pretty much everything is written in a matter-of-fact manner, without any embellishments. Zaidi does not believe in extra adjectives J.

Many of the incidents have been depicted in Hindi films or are well known. Haji Mastan’s dalliance with Bollywood, Varadarajan Mudaliar’s rise from a menial laborer, the attack on Chhota Rajan in Bangkok by Chhota Shakeel’s men. Gulshan Kumar’s murder on Abu Salem’s orders.  Mandakini’s association with Dawood, and Monica Bedi’s with Abu Salem.  The shootout at Lokhandwala (which is described very drily in the book unlike the film). Chhota Rajan’s parting ways with Dawood.

There are a few gruesome descriptions of murders that took place. But these constitute a fraction of the book, and overall does not make the book unpalatable.

The chapters on Haji Mastan and Varadarajan Mudaliar end abruptly. Also there is no mention of Chhota Rajan after the Bangkok attempt on his life. The book’s focus is clearly on one person.

Back to Dawood. The central character of this tome’s “rise” makes for fascinating reading. How the son of an upright police constable (whose name was highly respected not just in the police force but in society as well) landed up where he did is quite remarkable.  

The Mumbai police decided to cut the reigning Pathan gang by propping him up.

This was done (apparently) in filmi style. Senior police inspector Ranbeer Likha is shown complaining about all the problems caused by the Pathan mafia to the journalist Iqbal Natiq.

Natiq replies, ‘Sahab, Sholay.’

‘Sholay?! Have you lost your mind Iqbal?’ Likha asks.

‘You use iron to combat iron,’ Iqbal Natiq tells Likha.

In the bargain, they created a monster that continues to haunt this country even today.

The lack of coordination between government agencies has proven costly in India many times. Apparently the IB (Intelligence Bureau) decided to send 2 of Chhota Rajan’s sharpshooters to Dubai to eliminate Dawood on the occasion of his daughter’s wedding. But they failed to inform the Mumbai Crime Branch. An enthusiastic police officer arrested the sharpshooters on their way from India!

Dawood’s main strengths are shown to be his planning and adaptability. Even when he is forced to shift base (from Mumbai to Dubai and then to Pakistan) he manages to flourish in the new environment and rule over it.

Occasionally Zaidi does deviate from pure facts and strays into conjecture/hearsay. E.g. the assumption that Dawood did not know about the full extent of what was planned for  the 1993 Mumbai blasts. Zaidi’s analysis is that fundamentalism is not an inherent part of Dawood’s character, and that Dawood merely went with the flow for his own survival.

Overall, this book is an excellent compilation. I would recommend it to anyone who is interested in the history of Mumbai’s underworld in general and Dawood Ibrahim in particular.

Movie review - "404"

Movie review - "404"

This movie called "404" slipped by unnoticed in 2011. A friend recommended it to me, and so I bought the VCD recently. It turned out to be money well spent.

The movie has nothing to do with cyber space at all.
It is set in a premier medical institution. Students strive to get admitted in here.
The only dark spot is the despicable practice of ragging, that has become a "tradition" over time.

In the new batch that joins, pretty much everyone is afraid of the seniors. Except for 1 student - Abhimanyu - who stands up to them at each turn.
There is a locked room (number 404) in the hostel of the college that everyone is afraid of. It is the room where a previous student, Gaurav, had committed suicide. Due to rumors of his ghost being present, nobody wants to stay in it.

Abhimanyu takes up the challenge posted by the seniors and occupies the room. The seniors take advantage of this and rag him psychologically, always chanting that "Gaurav is still alive and that this is his room, so get out". There is a professor called Aniruddh who backs Abhimanyu. The professor believes only in rationality, and denies that anything paranomal can exist. He supports Abhimanyu in his struggle.

However, slowly things start taking a toll on Abhimanyu. He starts seeing Gaurav everywhere, and Gaurav even talks to him. His mental state becomes precarious, and the professor starts getting worried for him.

What is really happening? Is the psychological toll of ragging making Abhimanyu see the dead student? Or do ghosts really exist?

The director is new (Prawaal Raman), so some finesse is lacking. Also this is a low budget film. It shows everywhere in the making (a medical college does not have so few students :-)).

Also the film seems to be stuffed with newcomers for the same reason. Other than Satish Kaushik and Tisca Chopra, all the actors were unknown to me.

Other than these flaws, however, the film is totally watchable.

Rating: 3 or 3.5 / 5.

Movie review: Haunted (3D) --> Hindi

Movie review: Haunted (3D) --> Hindi

Saw "Haunted" (3D) today. It is one more horror movie from the Vikram Bhatt factory.

Story Summary:
A property dealer (Mimoh aka Mahakshay Chakraborty) tries to find the reason behind why the house that he is selling is haunted. He finds that a female spirit (Twinkle Bajpai) is being held captive by an evil male spirit (Arif Zakaria) in that house and does unspeakable things to her. The evil spirit refuses to let her go even after 80 years.

Mimoh tries to free the good female spirit by going back in time into her era and getting rid of the evil spirit.


Review:
I watched this movie expecting "paisa vasool" 3-D horror. It didn't live up to those expectations, but I enjoyed it all the same.

I would call it a masala + "IPL" horror film. This is a kind of film that is not pure horror, like IPL is not "pure" cricket - but it entertains!! Also it had a lot of (unintentional) comedy in it, that made us laugh till tears came from our eyes.


The real "hero" of this piece is Mimoh. He is going to be in the same league as the legendary Bharat Bhushan !!
Other actors have a lot of expressions for all kinds of scenes. Mimoh proves that that is totally unnecessary - he has 1 expression for all kinds of scenes!! Whether he is sad, happy, shocked, terrified, sentimental, intimate - all result in the same kind of expression. He could have made a good ghost, actually.

When Mimoh spouted intense dialogues, the theater roared with laughter. Especially the "Iyer", "Iyer", "Iyer" scene (yes, we finally have a South Indian ghost in Hindi films! Progress???)

Also Mimoh walks like a robot most of the time (maybe he was Rajni's duplicate in that movie). And he runs like no other filmi hero has run so far! His style of running is inimitable. Koi Shaq?


Arif Zakaria as the evil spirit does as decent a job as he could have, considering that he is shown as disfigured and generally yucky looking for most of the movie. He does all the required gruesomeness and "sounds" as per requirement. He also portrays lust using heavy breathing techniques that sound like bad Pranayam/Kapal Bhaati .


Halfway through the movie, Vikram Bhatt probably realized that Achint Kaur would also look damn good as a ghost. So Arif enters her body and Achint also gets to don the glamorous maggot-eaten-face, with blood splattered strategically. She also does a "lust" scene with Twinkle that seems to have been deliberately inserted to titillate, but just ends up leaving you feeling gross.

Twinkle Bajpai is no twinkling star. Her acting is just about OK. She plays an extremely dumb character, which explains why the evil Arif chose her as the victim (such an easy target is extremely hard to find).
She does the looking scared part decently. And considering that that is her look for 95% of the movie, that is good enough.

Some of the scenes are scary, others feel deliberately inserted. There are some good 3-D effects. Others are there just to make you feel happy about spending more on 3-D. I watched this on E-Square (Pune) screen, where the 3-D effect was not that great, just tolerable.


There are extremely corny dialogues littered throughout the movie . I think that the Bhatts keep cost down by using underpaid writers and copy-pasting dialogues from old movies.

Best enigmatic dialogue: "Yeh mujhe jaanta nahin, pehchanta hai!" (only 0.5% of the folks in this world understand it, including Mahesh and Vikram Bhatt).


There is a break dance scene where except for his facial expression, Mimoh does a pretty neat job. After all, dance runs in his veins! Koi Shaq?


Getting rid of spirits is done the old-fashioned way - with some national integration thrown in. A Christian priest prays, a Dargah pays a vital part and the Hindu concept of five elements is used.
What more do you want? Eliminate the entertainment tax on this movie right now!!


Watch this movie with an open mind, and you won't regret it. If you look for Omen or Poltergeist or "The Ring", you are bound to be disappointed.
Relax, chill, and enjoy the show!!