Random Thoughts

2012-01-22T18:34:00.001-08:00

Movie review - "404"

This movie called "404" slipped by unnoticed in 2011. A friend recommended it to me, and so I bought the VCD recently. It turned out to be money well spent.

The movie has nothing to do with cyber space at all.
It is set in a premier medical institution. Students strive to get admitted in here.
The only dark spot is the despicable practice of ragging, that has become a "tradition" over time.

In the new batch that joins, pretty much everyone is afraid of the seniors. Except for 1 student - Abhimanyu - who stands up to them at each turn.
There is a locked room (number 404) in the hostel of the college that everyone is afraid of. It is the room where a previous student, Gaurav, had committed suicide. Due to rumors of his ghost being present, nobody wants to stay in it.

Abhimanyu takes up the challenge posted by the seniors and occupies the room. The seniors take advantage of this and rag him psychologically, always chanting that "Gaurav is still alive and that this is his room, so get out". There is a professor called Aniruddh who backs Abhimanyu. The professor believes only in rationality, and denies that anything paranomal can exist. He supports Abhimanyu in his struggle.

However, slowly things start taking a toll on Abhimanyu. He starts seeing Gaurav everywhere, and Gaurav even talks to him. His mental state becomes precarious, and the professor starts getting worried for him.

What is really happening? Is the psychological toll of ragging making Abhimanyu see the dead student? Or do ghosts really exist?

The director is new (Prawaal Raman), so some finesse is lacking. Also this is a low budget film. It shows everywhere in the making (a medical college does not have so few students :-)).

Also the film seems to be stuffed with newcomers for the same reason. Other than Satish Kaushik and Tisca Chopra, all the actors were unknown to me.

Other than these flaws, however, the film is totally watchable.

Rating: 3 or 3.5 / 5.

2011-05-10T09:48:00.000-07:00

Movie review: Haunted (3D) --> Hindi

Saw "Haunted" (3D) today. It is one more horror movie from the Vikram Bhatt factory.

Story Summary:
A property dealer (Mimoh aka Mahakshay Chakraborty) tries to find the reason behind why the house that he is selling is haunted. He finds that a female spirit (Twinkle Bajpai) is being held captive by an evil male spirit (Arif Zakaria) in that house and does unspeakable things to her. The evil spirit refuses to let her go even after 80 years.

Mimoh tries to free the good female spirit by going back in time into her era and getting rid of the evil spirit.

Review:
I watched this movie expecting "paisa vasool" 3-D horror. It didn't live up to those expectations, but I enjoyed it all the same.

I would call it a masala + "IPL" horror film. This is a kind of film that is not pure horror, like IPL is not "pure" cricket - but it entertains!! Also it had a lot of (unintentional) comedy in it, that made us laugh till tears came from our eyes.

The real "hero" of this piece is Mimoh. He is going to be in the same league as the legendary Bharat Bhushan !!
Other actors have a lot of expressions for all kinds of scenes. Mimoh proves that that is totally unnecessary - he has 1 expression for all kinds of scenes!! Whether he is sad, happy, shocked, terrified, sentimental, intimate - all result in the same kind of expression. He could have made a good ghost, actually.

When Mimoh spouted intense dialogues, the theater roared with laughter. Especially the "Iyer", "Iyer", "Iyer" scene (yes, we finally have a South Indian ghost in Hindi films! Progress???)

Also Mimoh walks like a robot most of the time (maybe he was Rajni's duplicate in that movie). And he runs like no other filmi hero has run so far! His style of running is inimitable. Koi Shaq?

Arif Zakaria as the evil spirit does as decent a job as he could have, considering that he is shown as disfigured and generally yucky looking for most of the movie. He does all the required gruesomeness and "sounds" as per requirement. He also portrays lust using heavy breathing techniques that sound like bad Pranayam/Kapal Bhaati .

Halfway through the movie, Vikram Bhatt probably realized that Achint Kaur would also look damn good as a ghost. So Arif enters her body and Achint also gets to don the glamorous maggot-eaten-face, with blood splattered strategically. She also does a "lust" scene with Twinkle that seems to have been deliberately inserted to titillate, but just ends up leaving you feeling gross.

Twinkle Bajpai is no twinkling star. Her acting is just about OK. She plays an extremely dumb character, which explains why the evil Arif chose her as the victim (such an easy target is extremely hard to find).
She does the looking scared part decently. And considering that that is her look for 95% of the movie, that is good enough.

Some of the scenes are scary, others feel deliberately inserted. There are some good 3-D effects. Others are there just to make you feel happy about spending more on 3-D. I watched this on E-Square (Pune) screen, where the 3-D effect was not that great, just tolerable.

There are extremely corny dialogues littered throughout the movie . I think that the Bhatts keep cost down by using underpaid writers and copy-pasting dialogues from old movies.

Best enigmatic dialogue: "Yeh mujhe jaanta nahin, pehchanta hai!" (only 0.5% of the folks in this world understand it, including Mahesh and Vikram Bhatt).

There is a break dance scene where except for his facial expression, Mimoh does a pretty neat job. After all, dance runs in his veins! Koi Shaq?

Getting rid of spirits is done the old-fashioned way - with some national integration thrown in. A Christian priest prays, a Dargah pays a vital part and the Hindu concept of five elements is used.
What more do you want? Eliminate the entertainment tax on this movie right now!!

Watch this movie with an open mind, and you won't regret it. If you look for Omen or Poltergeist or "The Ring", you are bound to be disappointed.
Relax, chill, and enjoy the show!!

2011-04-26T22:21:00.001-07:00

Found this nifty tip on the internet. You can blog directly using MS Word (Office 2007/2010 only) .

Just open Word, and select New --> Post.
If you are posting for the first time, then you will have to enter the credentials for the blog account (in my case, Blogger or blogspot.com).

Once you finish your post, click "Publish" and voila! Your post will be created!

2011-04-12T00:19:00.001-07:00

BBB zindabad!!

This is a post thanking the BBB (Better Business Bureau --> http://www.bbb.org/ ) for their help in getting an issue with an online merchant resolved for me. And hopefully it might help some other folks if needed in the future.

It all started in Sep 2010. I had ordered a few perfumes from FragranceX (http://www.fragrancex.com/) using my credit card online. The perfumes didn't come even after 3 months. So I wrote to them asking about the status.

Then started a series of "the package is in the mail" kind of replies. It was always the same story - "We have shipped the package, you should be getting it soon." Pretty soon I got frustrated and asked for a refund after 6 months had elapsed. But even for this request, I got the same replies - how much time is one expected to wait until a package comes from the US to India???

Then finally I thought about contacting BBB - USA. Basically BBB is an organization that holds businesses to a high standard, and only businesses with a high degree of integrity and trust make it to their list.

Snippet from their site:

BBB works closely with local, state and federal law enforcement agencies, providing them with valuable information on potential frauds. Many times we are the first organization to know about a developing scam and alert authorities and the public.

I opened a case with the BBB. It was assigned to the New York chapter as FragranceX is based nearby, in NJ. To cut a long story short, after BBB followed up with FragranceX, the money got refunded!

The main thing to note for me was that I am based in India. Yet BBB helped me get a refund from a company based in the US.

Thanks, BBB!! I wish there were more organizations like you!!

2011-04-03T23:51:00.000-07:00

Spare a thought for Gary Kirsten

The Indian cricket team is being lavishly praised, and rightly so!

But in the midst of all this, let's spare a thought for one man who has played a major role in us winning the World Cup - Gary Kirsten!

Gary came in after hurricane Chappel had left a trail of destruction in his wake. Many players had gone off-track in their careers - the most notable being Irfan. Others were low on confidence as "great" guru Chappel had messed up their minds.

Gary brought about a sense of calm to the team. He was the perfect coach for Indian conditions. He adjusted to our way of thinking, and went about his job systematically & sincerely.

He was always in the background, working hard at building team morale. He got in mental conditioning coaches to inspire the team at just the right moment.

At the same time he was very good at giving technical advice to those who were floundering; Gautam Gambhir being one of the most prominent ones to benefit.

Gary never said "I am the coach and whatever I say goes!". He always said "This is Dhoni's team". I don't think you would find a single Indian player who has bad things to say about him. And in our country, that counts for a lot :-).

Thank you, Gary. Hope you come back and take up this task again ...

IE 8 opening tabs slowly? There is a solution!

2010-12-16T02:50:00.001-08:00

I recently upgraded to IE 8. The major problem that I faced with it was that a "New Tab" would open very very slowly - it was painful!
Then I did some Googling and found a post that said "Turn off Java Add-On for IE 8". And that worked! Now new tabs open like a charm ...
So in IE 8

Go to Tools --> Manage Add-Ons
Select "Toolbars and Extensions".
Disable the following 2:

Java(tm) Plug-In 2 SSV Helper
JQSIEStartDetectorImpl Class

Both are published by Sun Microsystems, Inc.

No need to restart IE - it should speed your browsing experience considerably.

Problems with opening CHM Help files from Network or Internet?

2010-11-08T02:57:00.001-08:00

If you have problems opening/viewing CHM files that you downloaded, then this is how to view them properly.
This is due to a feature in Windows that tries to be overly helpful ...
Link: Problems with opening CHM Help files from Network or Internet - Rick Strahl's Web Log

Top funny source code comments

2010-09-21T21:04:00.001-07:00

Some comments written by developers that are too funny for words.
Link: Top funny source code comments | cObaia.net

2010-08-20T04:14:00.000-07:00

Poem from the movie "Seher"

This is one of my favorite poems (Hindi). It is from the movie "Seher" (starring Arshad Warsi, 2005).
I don't know if this is from existing literature, or was written just for the movie. Either way, it is too good!

In the film, this is recited when a dear friend of one of the characters is killed.

Is kaali thandi aag ko
Wapas kar raha hoon main
Aur isi ke saath lauta raha hoon
Ye safed mitti
Ye gatiheen paani
Ye bairi hawa
Aur ye athaa aakash
Jo goonga hai

Yun to main jaanta hoon Ishwar
Ke Tum jaante the
Ke ek din main ye sab kooch
Isi tarah Tumhe wapas kar doonga ...

2010-07-16T00:06:00.001-07:00

Day before yesterday I tried logging in to my Yahoo account, the one I am using since many years. I got an error message saying "This ID is not yet taken". I started panicking - was my account deleted by mistake or by a hacker maliciously????

Then reasoning took over. I tried to create a new account using the same ID. That attempt failed saying that the ID was not available as it was already taken. Phew! That means the ID was valid. First validation!!

I then sent a mail to that ID. It did not bounce. Double verification!!

Next I tried to contact Yahoo customer care. Here the fun part started.
For contacting Yahoo mail support services, the prominently visible
support links require you to login to mail first!! What about cases like mine where I can't login in the first case?? Nobody though of that?? :-O

The "help wizard" has support for cases where you have forgotten your ID or password, etc. But nothing for login errors in the system itself.

Googling revealed that there is a Yahoo mail for mobile link that usually works even if the rest of the login system kicks you out. I tried that at http://us.m.yahoo.com/p/login?.done=http%3A%2F%2Fus.m.yahoo.com%2Fp%2Fmail%3F

It worked!! I could access my mails!! Triple verification!!

I went back to the Yahoo mail help site. Somehow I found a link that does not require you to login, and sent feedback. (It is so well hidden, I may not find that link again :-) ).

After 1 day, I could miraculously login again. There is no response to my feedback mail, but I am still happy! :-)

Overall: Usability of the customer care section of Yahoo needs big-time improvement. Requiring folks to compulsorily login to contact Customer Care is just bad design!

The God of Tall Things: Interactive story [Link]

2010-06-30T01:59:00.001-07:00

A very funny story - read if you are a programmer.
Link: The God of Tall Things: Interactive story

2010-06-28T22:54:00.001-07:00

Movie Review: Kites

A little late to be writing this review, but who cares?

Some highlights of Kites - The Patangs:
--------------------------------------------------
1. There are places in the movie where 10-15 mins go by and nothing has really happened.

2. Mori is not beautiful. Most of our Indian film actresses are better looking than her. She has been chosen for other "qualities".

3. Hritik gets beat up/shot frequently. And you don't care.

4. You actually wish Kangana had a bigger part even if she is playing her standard "mentally disturbed person" role (Nana Patekar and Kangana don't have to act nowadays - they play themselves in all movies and get paid too).

5. The best part of the movie is when it gets over.

6. This is an "international standards" movie, but no person from any nation might like it.

7. They can save money and make many "MacroMan" ads by using sections of this movie.

Exchange: Unknown Error 0×80040600

2010-06-17T22:53:00.001-07:00

If you get an error message from exchange that has "Unknown Error 0×80040600" in it, then you are not getting all your emails from the server. The cure for this is to

Clear "Deleted Items"
Press F9 to get all emails

Got this information from this link: Absoblogginlutely! » Unknown Error 0×80040600

Worst "classic" movies to see before you die (Hindi)

2010-06-07T04:47:00.001-07:00

There are classic movies, that are praised by everyone (e.g. Gone With The Wind). And then there are the other type of "classic" movies - ones after seeing that you can't imagine why they were made in the first place.

These I call as the worst "classic" movies to see before you die.

I can proudly say that I have lasted through the
following:
--------------------------------------------------------
1.
Gunda (Mithunda) --> Family movie - provided each family member sees it

separately! Has characters whose names you can't take in public. See
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gunda_%28film%29
This
movie should be part of the "10 classic worst movies to see before you
die"
list. Words fail me ...

2. Jaani Dushman - Ek Anokhi Kahani (Terminator
+ Punarjanam+ Iccha dhari
saap + ... ) --> All time entertaining movie -
you can see it at any point
in the movie and still enjoy the
madness!!

3. Clerk (Manoj Kumar): Has scenes showing
a) Completely
out-of-shape Manoj "Bharat" Kumar and a grossly overweight
Shashi Kapoor as
college students
b) Curing heart attack with 2 battery cells - scientific
breakthrough!! -->
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2JtoYmOZFQE

There
are others. But if you manage to last through all these 3, you will find any
movie good!!

2010-05-13T20:08:00.000-07:00

The Formula

A short story I wrote. Hope you like it.
Posting in image(s) format to avoid copying (although determined folks can still do that :-) ).

This is (c) Amit Shirodkar. All rights reserved.

You can give comments on this blog or at amitshirodkar AT yahoo DOT com

Note: Click on each image to see it full size. Then click the browser's Back button to return to the page.

Some things never change ...

2010-03-29T03:51:00.001-07:00

I have broadband from BSNL. Last week I decided to upgrade the plan. In BSNL land, that means a trip to the nearest customer service center (changing your plan online is an alien concept here).

I prepared an application with all the required information (account number, telephone number, old plan name, new plan name, etc.). Reached the counter. The lady behind the counter studied my application and said "This is good. But unfortunately this is not in the right format".
Me: What is the format?
BSNL Lady: We have a separate form for this.
Me: I didn't find this form online on the BSNL site.
BSNL Lady: Hmm (gave me a look that said "Why did you expect to find it online?"

Me: (Took the form, filled it) Here it is.
BSNL Lady: We need a copy of the last paid bill.
Me: I don't have it with me. Can you please issue me a duplicate bill from your computer so that I can attach it with the application?
BSNL Lady: Sorry, we need a xerox copy of the original bill, not a duplicate one.
Me: What if I had lost the original bill?
BSNL Lady: Hmm (gave me a look that said, "We have a separate 10-step process for that case").

I had to go back home, find my original bill, take a xerox, attach it to the application, and then re-submit. Lots of time, effort, energy wasted. Anybody worried about efficiency here?
And to think that BSNL has all of my bills on their computers!! They know that I have paid the last one! Why should paper be wasted in taking a photocopy of a bill that everyone knows is paid? Save the planet, anyone?

Often we get nostalgic about certain things in life - mom's cooking, a particular place that we are fond of, friends, etc.
We wish that these should never change and stay exactly as they are. In my case, BSNL's behavior is NOT one of them!! :-)

Office 2007: New does not always mean improved

2010-01-12T07:19:00.001-08:00

Note: I know that Office 2007 has been around for about 3 years now, and so this post is outdated even before its written. But the point of this is to show how even huge companies with mega $ budgets for Research and Development can turn a decent product into an awful one!!

Recently my office "forced" me to upgrade to Office 2007 from Office 2003 - a new laptop was allocated to me, and the default image has Office 2007. So I had no choice but to accept that.

Pretty soon, I started hating it.

I am basically a Windows user, and really liked Office 2003. I had kept off upgrading to Office 2007 because my previous experience with Microsoft products is that the "improved" version is always significantly worse to use than the one you currently use.

Office 2007 seems to have been redesigned from the ground up in terms of usability. What I fail to see is which users would be happy with the new design because

Things that were simple to do previously are now extremely complicated
You can't do certain things (at least I couldn't find out - see below)
You have to Google often to seek solutions for ridiculously simple operations.

I will give 5 examples from Outlook (OL) itself. The rest of Office 2007 has more gems like these.

Example 1: Where is the BCC field?

In Outlook 2007, the BCC field is turned off by default. I use this field while sending non-official emails to a lot of people - I have had bad experiences in the past with people doing a "Reply All" to a thread (even if that thread has folks they don't even know). So BCC is the only option.

I hunted, hunted some more, and finally Googled.
The answer is: Open a new message, go to the Options field (in the message itself), and in "Fields" chose "Show BCC". Wow!!

Example 2: Justify text in an email? What for?

In OL 2007, you can't "justify" the text. There is left align, right align, and center align. You can't justify the text. You can do it in Word, thankfully! So if you want to send a "justified" mail, then you compose it in Word, and then paste it into Outlook. Very productive.

Example 3: I will go back to the default option every time

In OL 2007, suppose you want to insert 3 images into an email (inline embedded). OK, so then you select "Insert --> Picture". That does the job.
Then what would you do?
Click on "Picture" again, of course!
Wrong! Can't do that!
Why?
Because now the "Format" sub-tab is selected that allows you to format a picture. So you have to select "Insert" again. That is loads of fun if you have to insert many images.

There is a workaround for the above, but it is well hidden. When you select "Insert --> Picture", you can actually select multiple images. But then, why not name it "Picture(s)" or "Pictures"? Oh, and BTW, the order in which the images are inserted is "last image first" (LIFO). So if you select 1, 2, and 3 then the order in which they get inserted into the mail is 3, 2, 1. Go figure.

Example 4: I got tired of the "File" Menu

In OL 2007, open a new message. Look for the "File" menu, which has been the default for ages and ages. It's not there!! Instead you have to click on the new Office icon, and then only can you access the normal "File" menu. Why this new design? Does it give the user any advantages? Or is being "cool" the only criterion? "Cool" should always be accompanied by "useful". And in case of doubt, always choose the latter over the former.

Example 5: I will render HTML in a manner that is worse than the previous version!

This is the most incredible part of OL 2007. HTML rendering has been taken back - way, way back from what it was in OL 2003. The reason is that some people in the team, in their infinite wisdom, decided that they would take a winning HTML rendering engine from Internet Explorer and replace it with a crappy one from Word. Word is extremely bad at rendering HTML. And to actually switch the engine from IE to Word is the equivalent of shooting yourself in the foot!
There is a good thread on this already here.

Summary: New does not always mean improved. To improve something one has to think of what the customer wants, and single-mindedly execute on that plan. Just putting in features for the heck of it is not good. And replacing what was good in a previous version of the software with something that is just plain bad is worse. I hope the Office team at MS pays attention to all the feedback on the net while designing the next version. Else history will repeat itself ...

Aman Ki Asha, an Indo-Pak Peace Project

2010-01-07T22:50:00.001-08:00

A new peace initiative between India and Pakistan by the Times Of India and Jang Group (Pakistan).

Beautiful video...

My Newfound Spirituality from Asami Asami by Pu La Deshpande

2010-01-05T00:48:00.001-08:00

A very good translation of part of the Marathi novel "Asami Asami" by Pu La Deshpande. A translation can't match the original language's punch, but still this is a very good effort.

Link: Vantage point: My Newfound Spirituality from Asami Asami by Pu La Deshpande

2010-01-01T07:33:00.001-08:00

Quotes from Agatha Christie novels

Agatha Christie is one of my favorite authors. I can read her mystery books over and over again, and each time they are as delicious as they were the first time.

There are some famous gems - pearls of wisdom actually, hidden in her novels. I have picked a few of my favorites. I am sure there are many, many more. But this is a good start.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"I do not approve of murder."
- Hercule Poirot, recurring quote, 1st seen in "Poirot's Early Cases"

"The worst is so often true."
- Miss Jane Marple, They Do It with Mirrors

"You can only really get under anybody’s skin if you are married to them."
- Miss Jane Marple, The Body in the Library

"She has made her bed and she must lie on it."
- Emily Arundell, Dumb Witness OR Poirot Loses a Client

"Understand this, I mean to arrive at the truth.
The truth, however ugly in itself, is always curious and beautiful to seekers after it."
- Hercule Poirot, The Murder of Roger Ackroyd

"Crime is terribly revealing.
Try and vary your methods as you will, your tastes, your habits, your attitude of mind, and your soul is revealed by your actions."
- Hercule Poirot, The ABC Murders

"Every murderer is probably somebody’s old friend."
- Hercule Poirot, The Mysterious Affair at Styles

The impossible could not have happened, therefore the impossible must be possible in spite of appearances.
- Hercule Poirot, Murder on the Orient Express

"You know that in all tombs there is always a false door?"
Renisenb stared. "Yes, of course."
"Well, people are like that too. They create a false door - to deceive. If they are conscious of weakness, of inefficiency, they make an imposing door of self-assertion, of bluster, of overwhelming authority - and, after a time, they get to believe in it themselves. They think, and everybody thinks, that they are like that. But behind that door, Renisenb, is a bare rock ... And so when reality comes and touches them with the feather of truth - their true self reasserts itself."
- Death Comes as the End

Captain Hastings: [referring to marriage] You ever thought about it?
Hercule Poirot: In my experience, I know of five cases of wives being murdered by their devoted husbands.
Captain Hastings: Oh?
Hercule Poirot: And twenty-two husbands being murdered by their devoted wives. So thank you, no. Marriage, it is not for me.
- The Double Clue

Her voice broke suddenly.
Miss Marple said gently:
" I am only a stranger, but I am so very very sorry."
And suddenly, uncontrollably, Letitia Blacklock wept.

It was a piteous overmastering grief, with a kind of hopelessness about it. Miss Marple sat quite still.
Miss Blacklock sat up at last. Her face was swollen and blotched with tears.
" I'm sorry," she said. " It - it just came over me. What I've lost. She - she was the only link with the past,
you see. The only one who - who remembered. Now that she's gone I'm quite alone."
" I know what you mean," said Miss Marple.
"One is alone when the last one who remembers is gone.
I have nephews and nieces and kind friends - but there's no one who knew me as a
young girl - no one who belongs to the old days.
I've been alone for quite a long time now."

- A Murder is Announced

Who am I? Poem by Bulleh Shah (1680-1757)

2009-12-16T23:15:00.001-08:00

One of my favorites. Was sent the link to the page below by my better half. It has a very good translation!

Have copy-pasted the entire text of the original post on arbitmax because pages have a habit of disappearing on the web :-)

Original Post: ArbitMAX!: August 2008

Copy paste -->

Original poem:

Who am I?
Bulleh Shah (1680-1757)

Na maen momin vich maseet aan
Na maen vich kufar diyan reet aan
Na maen paakaan vich paleet aan
Na maen moosa na pharaun.
Bulleh! Ki jaana maen kaun?

Na maen andar ved kitaab aan,
Na vich bhangaan na sharaab aan
Na maen rindaan masat kharaab aan
Na maen jaagan na vich saun.
Bulleh! Ki jaana maen kaun?

Na maen shaadi na ghamnaaki
Na maen vich paleeti paaki
Na maen aabi na maen khaki
Na maen aatish na maen paun
Bulleh! Ki jaana maen kaun?

Na maen arabi na lahori
Na maen hindi shehar nagauri
Na hindu na turak peshawri
Na maen rehnda vich nadaun
Bulleh! Ki jaana maen kaun?

Na maen bheth mazhab da paaya
Ne maen aadam havva jaaya
Na maen apna naam dharaaya
Na maen baitthan na vich bhaun
Bulleh! Ki jaana maen kaun?

Avval aakhir aap nu jaana
Na koi dooja hor pehchaana
Maethon hor na koi siyaana
Bulleh Shah khadda hai kaun?
Bulleh! Ki jaana maen kaun?

Translation:

I am not a believer inside the mosque
nor a pagan disciple of false rites.
I am not the pure amongst the impure
neither Moses nor the Pharaoh.
Bulleh! Who am I?

I am not in the Vedas
neither in opium nor in wine.
I am not in the drunkard's daze
neither asleep, nor awake.
Bulleh! Who am I?

I am neither in happiness nor in sorrow
neither clean, nor filthy.
I am not from water or the earth
neither fire, nor from air, is my birth.
Bulleh! Who am I?

I am not an Arab, I am not from Lahore,
neither am I from the city of Nagaur.
I am not a Hindu, or a Turk from Peshawar
nor do I stay in Nadaun.
Bulleh! Who am I?

I have never understood the point of religion,
I am not born from Adam and Eve,
I am not just the name,
Neither in stillness, nor in motion.
Bulleh! Who am I?

I am the first, I am the last
None other, have I ever known
I am the wisest of them all
Bulleh Shah - who is this standing here?
Bulleh! Who am I?

Pink Panther (2006) - I would like to buy a hamburger

2009-12-10T02:50:00.001-08:00

Steve Martin is a riot in this movie - one of my all time favorites!!

A sample:
Ponton: He was just found dead in a training facility locker room. Shot in the head.
Clouseau: Was it fatal?
Ponton: Yes.
Clouseau: How fatal?
Ponton: Um, completely.
Clouseau: I want to talk to him now!

2009-11-26T21:52:00.000-08:00

Zen stories

A few of my favorites. Taken from various emails and zen story websites such as
http://www.101zenstories.com and
http://spiritualinquiry.com/zen-stories/

The Nature of Things

Two monks were washing their bowls in the river when they noticed a scorpion that was drowning. One monk immediately scooped it up and set it upon the bank. In the process he was stung. He went back to washing his bowl and again the scorpion fell in. The monk saved the scorpion and was again stung.

The other monk asked him, "Friend, why do you continue to save the scorpion when you know it's nature is to sting?"

"Because," the monk replied, "to save it is my nature."

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Transient

A famous spiritual teacher came to the front door of the King's palace. None of the guards tried to stop him as he entered and made his way to where the King himself was sitting on his throne.

"What do you want?" asked the King, immediately recognizing the visitor.

"I would like a place to sleep in this inn,"
replied the teacher.

"But this is not an inn," said the King,
"It is my palace."

"May I ask who owned this palace before you?"

"My father. He is dead."

"And who owned it before him?"

"My grandfather. He too is dead."

"And this place where people live for a short time and then move on - did I hear you say that it is NOT an inn?"

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Without Fear

During the civil wars in feudal Japan, an invading army would quickly sweep into a town and take control. In one particular village, everyone fled just before the army arrived - everyone except the Zen master.

Curious about this old fellow, the general went to the temple to see for himself what kind of man this master was.

When he wasn't treated with the deference and submissiveness to which he was accustomed, the general burst into anger.

"You fool," he shouted as he reached for his sword, "don't you realize you are standing before a man who could run you through without blinking an eye!"

But despite the threat, the master seemed unmoved.

"And do you realize," the master replied calmly, "that you are standing before a man who can be run through without blinking an eye?"

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Obsessed

Two traveling monks reached a river where they met a young woman. Wary of the current, she asked if they could carry her across. One of the monks hesitated, but the other quickly picked her up onto his shoulders, transported her across the water, and put her down on the other bank. She thanked him and departed.

As the monks continued on their way, the one was brooding and preoccupied. Unable to hold his silence, he spoke out.

"Brother, our spiritual training teaches us to avoid any contact with women, but you picked that one up on your shoulders and carried her!"

"Brother," the second monk replied,
"I set her down on the other side long ago. Why are you still carrying her?"

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Going with the Flow

A Taoist story tells of an old man who accidentally fell into the river rapids leading to a high and dangerous waterfall. Onlookers feared for his life. Miraculously, he came out alive and unharmed downstream at the bottom of the falls. People asked him how he managed to survive.

"I accommodated myself to the water, not the water to me. Without thinking, I allowed myself to be shaped by it. Plunging into the swirl, I came out with the swirl. This is how I survived.”

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Wanting God

A hermit was meditating by a river when a young man interrupted him. "Master, I wish to become your disciple," said the man. "Why?" replied the hermit. The young man thought for a moment. "Because I want to find God."

The master jumped up, grabbed him by the scruff of his neck, dragged him into the river, and plunged his head under water. After holding him there for a minute, with him kicking and struggling to free himself, the master finally pulled him up out of the river. The young man coughed up water and gasped to get his breath.

When he eventually quieted down, the master spoke. "Tell me, what did you want most of all when you were under water."

"Air!" answered the man.

"Very well," said the master. "Go home and come back to me when you want God as much as you just wanted air."

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Publishing the Sutras

Tetsugen, a devotee of Zen in Japan, decided to publish the sutras, which at that time were available only in Chinese. The books were to be printed with wood blocks in an edition of seven thousand copies, a tremendous undertaking.

Tetsugen began by traveling and collecting donations for this purpose. A few sympathizers would give him a hundred pieces of gold, but most of the time he received only small coins. He thanked each donor with equal gratitude. After ten years Tetsugen had enough money to begin his task.

It happened that at that time the Uji River overflowed. Famine followed. Tetsugen took the funds he had collected for the books and spent them to save others from starvation. Then he began again his work of collecting.

Several years afterwards an epidemic spread over the country. Tetsugen again gave away what he had collected, to help his people.

For a third time he started his work, and after twenty years his wish was fulfilled. The printing blocks which produced the first edition of sutras can be seen today in the Obaku monastery in Kyoto.

The Japanese tell their children that Tetsugen made three sets of sutras, and that the first two invisible sets surpass even the last.

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2009-11-10T23:32:00.000-08:00

Song - Tanhayee (Dil Chahta Hai)

One of my favorites - beautiful song!! Lyrics that touch your heart, and Sonu Nigam singing ... 'nuff said.

YouTube - Tanhayee-Dil Chatha Hai

2009-10-07T02:44:00.001-07:00

The barcode has turned 57!! In celebration of this event, Google has come up with a logo on their home page.

Article:
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2009/10/07/AR2009100700130.html

Image taken from Google site:

2009-09-13T07:01:00.000-07:00

The flight of swines and the plight of humans

My city, Pune, has been the center of attention in the recent past. Reason: Swine Flu!!

Many cases of the H1N1 virus have been detected in my fine city. Sadly, we lost a number of citizens to this disease ( less than 100, AFAIK, but even 1 death is a death too many).

This post is not about the disease or its technical aspects, or even how to combat the disease. You can Google this and there are a lot of sites that will give you this information.

My post is about the human reactions to the Swine Flu outbreak, and my observations regarding the same.

What I have noticed during the swine flu outbreak is:

People panic easily.
I know that this disease can kill, but that is no reason to lose your head and run around like headless chickens just because there is such an outbreak. I have seen literally hordes of people looking like extras in a dacoit movie, with masks of all kinds & colors on their faces. Basanti, in suwaron ke saamne mat nacho!!

People refused to come to offices and work. Those that did stared at everyone else for any signs of discomfort. A slight cough would act as the firing gun for a 100 meter race!! Run for your lives!! She sneezed!! He coughed!! Bhago, bhago!!

Folks started running away every time someone sneezed or coughed. The fastest way to empty a meeting in those days was to start coughing :-). Normally sane people would jump out of their skins on hearing anyone clearing their throat!! Even I have taken a homeopathic medicine that supposedly "ward off" the Swine Flu (for those interested, the medicine is called "Influenzium 200"). My better half refused to take part in this "swineful" activity (pardon the English).

There were huuuuuuuuge queues in front of hospitals that were screening patients for Swine flu. IMO, the fastest way of getting this disease is to stand in a line for hours and hours with people who might have it...

It would be funny if it weren't so tragic. In the past globally we have had SARS, bird flu, etc. This seems to be a trend that would continue in coming years (I would be glad to be proved wrong on this one). So the solution can't lie in panicking and losing one's head. We as citizens have to get together, think logically and act sensibly.
The Government at the Centre worked reasonably well, the ones at the State level slept.
The Central government actually took steps that were reasonably rapid. This is a big thing in India!! Governments do not work here!! They usually fiddle like that Nero chap while Delhi/Chennai/Pune etc. burn.

But I will give the Devil his due. Our Central government did a reasonably good job of reacting to this crisis. Medicines were procured rapidly and dispatched. The Health Minister monitored the crisis personally.

The reason the rating is still "reasonably good" is that no one came before the news media and gave a fast, rational respone to the crisis. No one at the higher level did a good job or reassuring the people of the country that this crisis was being dealt with. And the honorable Health minister made some statements that come under the irresponsible category (what's new?). Crisis management lessons, anyone?

The State government failed miserably.
Schools were not closed in time. Now anyone can tell you that any outbreak spreads the most rapidly in schools. In a school, children come in contact with hundreds of other children. They go home and play with other children from other schools. They also naturally come in contact with their own families. It is really a simple thing to deduce that the impact of not closing schools in time would be disastrous.
But then, this is the Sarkar, yaar!!

Another thing that the State government did not do was open more screening centers for checking those folks who had flu-like symptoms. The result was huge queues of hundreds or maybe even thousands of people at a handful of centers. This was totally unnecessary and avoidable.

Public festivals like Dahi Handi and Ganeshotsav were not stopped by the government. It was the mandals who carried out a low-key affair in both cases.

Also same thing as the Centre level - no one came forward to assuage the fears of the populace.
Doctors and Nursing staff worked their hearts out.
In India, it is always the "mango people" / aam janta / ordinary blokes who show courage under fire. Ministers push you into the fire.

Anyway, a salute to the unsung heroes of the crisis! Doctors and nursing staff at the Naidu Hospital and Aundh Chest hospital in Pune (among others), worked their respective behinds off. A special thanks to the staff at NIV, Pune for testing thousands and thousands of samples that poured in from all over the country. I know that they must not have gotten any rewards for this - monetary or otherwise. But still kudos to all of you!!
People's hygienic(?) habits remained unchanged.
In spite of all the notices put up everywhere detailing how Swine flu spreads, the lack of hygiene continued. Spitting in public continued unabated. So did "clearing" your nose (for those who don't know, that entails removing the good stuff from the insides of the nostrils and depositing it on the roads). The more you think about it, there doesn't seem to be much difference between pigs and such people.

People still do not wash their hands when they should. Nuff said.

This kind of "swineful" behavior (I should get this word added to the dictionary) is not unique to Pune, and can be seen all over India. But one would think that the Swine Flu would improve folks, out of fear at least if nothing else. No such luck.

So what next? We wait for the next outbreak.

The next time it could be from donkeys. Why not? We have a lot of them anyway - not just the the four-legged but the two-legged kind as well. Hee Haw!!

Funny Hindi Shayari

2009-08-16T22:06:00.001-07:00

Found this on various sites on the net ....

Usne mehndi laga rakhi thi
Humne uski doli utha rakhi thi
Hum ko maloom tha ke woh bewafa niklegi
Issi liye humne pehle se uski behan pata ke rakhi thi!!

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Meri jindagi ek jua banke reh gayi
Meri jindagi ek jua banke reh gayi
Maine jise pyaar kiya
Woh mere baccho ki bua banke reh gayi

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Gum ho gayi make-up mein
Asli ki pehchan
Upar se Taj Mahal
Andar se kabristaan!!

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Dil ke armaan aasu me beh gaye
Ye aashique ka dard tha
Jo baat unse kehni thi
Light chali gayi aur unki mummy se keh gaye!!

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Vo aaj bhi hume dekh kar muskurate hain
Vo aaj bhi hume dekh kar muskurate hain
Yeh to unke bachche hi kamine hain
Jo Mama Mama kehke bulaate hain

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Kadam kadam pe hawa ki aahat ka dhyan rakhna,
Mushkil samay mein bhi iss dost ko yaad rakhna,
Hamari yaadon ki khushboo zaroor aayegi,
Tum bus apni naak saaf rakhna!!

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Teri yaad mein humne kalam uthaayi
Liya paper aur tasveer aapki banayi
Socha tha ki usko dil se laga kar rakhenge
Magar vo to bacho ko daraane ke kaam aayi...

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2009-08-08T11:43:00.000-07:00

What’s the occasion?

I have a habit of periodically buying sweets/chocolates in bulk, and distributing them to colleagues and friends in my office. I do this most of the time for no rhyme or reason whatsoever.

I send a “Sweets at my desk” e-mail to inform people of the availability of the same.
What happens most of the time is that people read the mail, rush over, take a sweet and then ask – “What’s the occasion? Why are you distributing sweets?”

They expect some “logical” answer – e.g. buying something new, some achievement, some good news, or if nothing else, a birthday!!

I often wonder why we adults always try to look for a “logical” reason all the time. Have you ever given a sweet to a child? The child takes it without asking you the reason, eats it up as fast as he/she can, and then brings his hand forward and asks “Do you have some more?” He does not think of the reason why the sweet was purchased – just the pure enjoyment of eating it is the goal!!

It is sad that as we grow up, we lose the quality of living in the moment. Our worldly wisdom comes in the way of enjoying something wholeheartedly. The flight of a butterfly, warm sun rays in winter, the shimmering moonlight bouncing off the surface of a lake, the sound of the ocean, a babbling brook, a sunset or sunrise, the first rain showers of the season …
If nature stopped and thought “Why should these things happen? What’s the occasion?” Then we might not have any of these at all. Thank God that Nature does not wait for any ceremonial reason to do things!!

So next time someone asks me “What’s the occasion?”, I might reply “Life”. That is a great reason to celebrate, isn’t it?

© Amit Shirodkar, 2009. All rights reserved

2009-07-06T02:12:00.001-07:00

Movie Review: Kambakkth Ishq

Short review: Utterly hopeless.

Long review:
1. No story.

2. Kareena tries to match/outdo Priyanka's "exposure" in Dostana. She is backed up by "Take Kareena, get me free" Amrita Arora.

3. Sleazy dialogues, toilet humor and scenes galore. Akshay Kumar breaking wind on a bride's face is one example. The fact that the bride was Amrita still does not justify it.

4. Talented actors like Boman Irani & Javed Jaffri totally wasted.

5. Lots of money spent and wasted on Sylvester Stallone & Denise Richards.
Without a story, even Hollywood superstars can't do anything.

6. Akshay Kumar's timing - comic or otherwise fails most of the time. The only good scene was his acceptance speech at the awards ceremony.

The movie is like a house where a tremendous amount of money has been spent
on the interior decoration, but while building it the foundation was left rotten. As expected, ultimately it collapses :-).

Adding Flickr gadget to Blogger

2009-06-09T03:53:00.001-07:00

If you have both Flickr and Blogger accounts, then this might be useful for you..

You can add a small preview of your Flickr photos on your Blogger site. You can choose the layout, how many snaps to preview, etc. Just follow the link below for instructions ...

Link: Bill's Blog: Adding Flickr gadget to Blogger

2009-06-04T03:30:00.000-07:00

Gunmaster G-9!!

For those who don’t know, the great Mithunda played a James Bond-like character called “GunMaster G-9” in 2 movies (Suraksha followed by Wardat).

Here are a few fantastic scenes depicting the one and only Mithunda as Gunmaster G-9!!

World-famous Kung-Fu (Suraksha):

Bruce Lee and Jackie Chan are nothing compared to the fists of fury of Mithunda!! Watch him execute some superb moves with his special battle cry (Aaaayeeeee!!)

Also check out the ferocious man-eating fish in the end – awesome!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZRK-xLl_Des

Asli Bengal Tiger (Wardat):

Who is the real Bengal Tiger? Mithunda – Koi Shaq??

If a tiger can jump fast, Mithunda can jump faster!! There is no one who can match his speed and talent!! Watch him fight with a tiger (and give him a dental checkup at the same time)!!

This scene has other gems like a woman throwing knives gently at people and yet managing to kill them, unique time bomb (melting candles can kill you!!), etc. etc.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eq6KNgKfe3g

Theme song (Suraksha):

Bond-like theme song sung by another great – Bappi Lahiri!! “Mausam hai gaane ka …”

Since India is cheaper than the west, we seem to have gotten a lot of Bond girls (buy 1 get 4 free)!! See them dance around Mithunda like a merry go-round and also get stuffed into a car or boat. Also there is a lady in red who dances like she has been possessed!!

Plus a spectacular save of a child and some funky special effects in red/green background….

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LEH3qxNmlNg

Windows: OverDisk - Visualize Folder Size Allocatio

2009-05-25T04:56:00.001-07:00

An utility that helps you find which folders on a drive are taking the maximum space. Easy to use. Has graphical visualization that helps you zero in on the folders that are taking maximum space on that drive.

Link: Elias Fotinis OverDisk :: Visualize Folder Size Allocation

Zanjeer: The making of a legend

2009-05-22T06:14:00.001-07:00

The inside story of how Zanjeer was made. Some very interesting anecdotes as well.

Link: Rediff On The Net, Movies: Prakash Mehra on the making of a legend

Enabling Reply To All in Microsoft Outlook

2009-04-27T04:25:00.001-07:00

Some companies disable the "Reply to All" feature in Microsoft Outlook. Now why they choose to do that is beyond me.

I know that a few users do abuse this feature - I think all of us have gotten annoying mails from someone or the other who chose to do a "Reply All" instead of using his/her common sense.
But having such a drastic solution for this problem creates more problems than it solves. It handicaps users who have to do a legitimate "Reply All" for work related mails. (Or even when you have to reply to say 5 out of the 7 people on the mail thread - doing a Reply to All and then removing the extra 2 folks is much easier than pasting everyone's email ID again).

But, fortunately, there is a workaround. You can't enable the "Reply To All" button. But you can create a new button that does exactly the same thing as that one.

Read the post below. I have tried it myself, and it works!!

Link: Neil Mitchell's Haskell Blog: Enabling Reply To All in Outlook

2009-04-13T01:23:00.000-07:00

And the usability award goes to .... Microsoft Outlook Address book!!

Just thought of letting you know that Microsoft Outlook’s address book is the clear winner in the Usability awards section!!

Sample 1: --> If you want to remove a person from a list/group that you have created, then you have to double-click the list. Then the following UI shows up.

E.g. if I select “User 1” and then press the cross (X) or delete button, "User 1" should get deleted from the “List-Sample” list. Correct?

Wrong!! Guess what happens?

The list “List-Sample” itself gets deleted!! And that too without a confirmation dialog. So you have no way of knowing that you are about to delete a list. There is no Undo function here as well.

Sample 2: --> You can’t copy a list. You have to add the same members all over again in the new one.

Hats off to great innovation at Microsoft!! I guess the user group that they tested the address book with didn’t know any people and hence their address book must have been empty :-).

Earth Hour 2009

2009-04-08T23:11:00.001-07:00

More than 1,000 cities in over 80 countries observed Earth Hour 2009 on Saturday March 28th. See the effect it had - just fantastic!! If we make this a regular event, it will go a long way in conserving resources on our planet ...

Link: Earth Hour 2009 - The Big Picture - Boston.com

Why usability training is required for engineers

2009-03-13T04:21:00.001-07:00

I am a software engineer myself. But sometimes I think that one of the subjects that should compulsorily be taught in Software Engineering is Usability and User Centric Design. Because this subject is not taught, engineers end up making the end user's life very difficult, thus defeating the very purpose of creating software for that user.

Latest reason: My extremely poor user experience with using Motorola Phone Tools (MPT).

Background: I have a Motorola Razr V3I phone, purchased 2-3 years ago. One day, it suddenly started giving me trouble. Whenever I tried to read my SMS Outbox, the phone would reboot!!

I thought I would try a software upgrade. So I went to the Motorola website and downloaded the latest software for the cell phone.

The upgrade went off well overall, except for the part that it wiped out all my contacts. The upgrade did not prompt me to save my personal data manually in another location (it only had a check box for automatic backup and restore). Otherwise I might have done that to save me further grief. But that is a separate story. At least it brought back a lot of my personal data.

The real fun started now. Fortunately I had taken a backup of my cell's Contacts folder a few months ago. So I had something to fall back on.

The backup was taken by Motorola Phone Tools (MPT). I started MPT, and asked it to restore the data.
Data restored, me happy, right? Wrong!! The software failed to restore a backup that it itself had taken!! Wow!!

Googling revealed that a later version of MPT might solve the problem. So I downloaded MPT ver 4.5 and tried with it.

MPT deleted my SIM card's contents. It deleted my phone's contacts. It restored my SIM's contents. And it .... DID NOT restore my phone's contacts!!

"Failed to restore data" was the extremely verbose and helpful error message given by MPT.

I am a Software Engineer, and we do not give up that easily!! I opened the file that had the contacts list (approx 500). It was a text file (delimited by semi-colons ";" for the tech-savvy people out there).

Instead of all the records, I took 50 at a time. The 1st 50 succeeded!! I had 50 contacts transferred to my phone. Then I took the next 50, and so on.

I had a failure for the 251-300th records case. I then narrowed it down to 1 record. Changing 1 field made that record pass!! Actually it was 1 number that I changed, and presto!! It worked.

To cut a long story short, only 2 records out of 500 had problems!! And for that I got absolutely no help from MPT itself!!

There were many reasonable options that MPT developers could have given:

Say that "2 out of 500 records are bad".
Pointed out which ones were bad.
Pointed out which field in the bad records was causing a problem with the import.
Given tips on how to fix it.
Imported the remaining 498!! How difficult is it to ignore failures and move on with the rest of the data?

Seriously, the folks who worked on that piece need a crash course on thinking from the end user's point of view. If I had not been an engineer myself, I would have quit long back on trying to get anything to work.

I still am going to quit - on Motorola cell phones. My next one will definitely NOT be a Motorola.

I have great respect for the Motorola company. This is one company that has extremely high standards for their products. Their hardware products are one of the best.

But if they are taking no pains with the usability of their products, then there is no point in buying from them - especially if the product happens to be a consumer one.

I know that the engineering team that made MPT must be working hard. They probably did not think that in case an error occurs, they should take pains to make life easier for folks that are using the software. But this is no excuse.

God knows how many such engineers in different companies are writing software that is fundamentally good, but lacks in usability. According to me, User centric design is NOT optional. In today's world, it is a must.

Usability design training must be given to each and every engineer working on a software product. Making life easier for the end user must be one of the goals of any software project ...

2009-02-16T21:55:00.001-08:00

Awesome photos for 2008!!

The year 2008 in photographs (part 1 of 3)
The year 2008 in photographs (part 2 of 3)
The year 2008 in photographs (part 3 of 3)

2009-02-13T01:32:00.001-08:00

La Boîte noire (The Black Box)

Saw this on Star Movies yesterday - French movie with subtitles.

Story: Arthur is driving on a steep road. Suddenly his car skids, and he has a major accident. After he wakes up, he has trouble remembering details of his life.

But there is hope. While he was not conscious, he blurts out a lot of details which the hospital nurse picks up. She writes it all down in a black diary. These notes contain the keys to various parts of his subconscious memory - or the "black box" that is present in everyone's mind.

There is a lingering trauma in Arthur's life that had happened when he was young. He must solve this to have peace. Arthur desperately tries to solve this puzzle with the help of these snippets. The way he goes about doing that and what happens to him along the way forms the basis of the movie.

The movie cuts from reality to fantasy and back so quickly that one is kept guessing as to what is being currently shown - is it a dream or not?

The end was sadly below my expectations. Also after having watched Memento, I would rank this one as much lower than that.

See it for the visual effects (good old camera work, not animation) and slick direction.

Overall: 6/10.

IMDB link: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0414879/plotsummary

How to Photograph Children

2009-01-23T02:09:00.001-08:00

Very nice tips on how to shoot snaps of children.

Link: How to Photograph Children

Video: Time Lapse of Los Angeles

2009-01-22T23:11:00.001-08:00

Very nice video - well shot!!

Link: Time Lapse of Los Angeles on Vimeo

2009-01-17T09:41:00.000-08:00

Glory in the flower - Wordsworth

Came across this and thought of sharing. From “Intimations of Immortality from Recollections of Early Childhood” by William Wordsworth.

What though the radiance which was once so bright

Be now for ever taken from my sight,

Though nothing can bring back the hour

Of splendour in the grass, of glory in the flower;

We will grieve not, rather find

Strength in what remains behind;

In the primal sympathy

Which having been must ever be;

In the soothing thoughts that spring

Out of human suffering;

In the faith that looks through death,

In years that bring the philosophic mind.

Full ode at http://www.poets.org/viewmedia.php/prmMID/15926

2009-01-09T02:16:00.000-08:00

The new Satyam nursery rhyme

Got 2 rhymes in my mail about the Satyam scandal. I got inspired to make a third one.

2 rhymes in the mail:

Raju Raju sat on a wall
Raju Raju had a great fall
Balance sheet died
Shareholders cried
Raju Raju made a fraud

Raju Raju
Yes baba
Cheating us
No baba
Telling Lies
No baba
Open the balance sheet
HA HA HA

My composition (original):

Rock a bye investor

On the Satyam stock top

When the Maytas deal breaks

The exchange will rock

When the fraud breaks

The Satyam will fall

Down will come investor

Raju and all

2009-01-01T21:15:00.000-08:00

Common Errors in English

Very nice site. Lists common mistakes that we make in English e.g. bullion vs bouillon.

Link: http://www.wsu.edu/~brians/errors/errors.html

The Ugly Indian Tourist

2008-12-26T09:51:00.001-08:00

Recently we had gone to Ladghar in Konkan. Stayed at the Pears beach resort. Nice place - I would recommend staying here.

But this isn't about Ladghar, Pears resort, or even the Konkan. This article is about us Indians as tourists. And how we desperately are in need of improvement.

Back to what happened at Ladghar. We had a lovely time there. The only blight on our trip was when a big group landed, nay, rolled in like a pack of cats jumping on empty barrels.

The noise they made was enough to wake the dead (and kill them again). This behavior was consistent across all age groups. It was as if there was a competition going on as to who could shout the loudest. Age 3 to 73, all of them braying to their hearts' content. Now if kids shout, that is understood. But when adults also do the same thing, then it is just not done. When those who are supposed to enforce discipline need disciplining themselves, then it becomes a very sad scene indeed.

I think most of you can guess the state that they came from. But this is not about a particular group of people either. This is about all of us Indians as tourists, and our behavioral pattern while doing so.

This pattern of behavior is repeated not just in India, but overseas as well. I remember an incident when I had gone to London with some colleagues from my erstwhile organization. At the hotel where I stayed, the employees around me used to give us strange glances when we used to pass by. I generally noticed that they were not comfortable when they used to see us. At that point in time, I put it down to simple racism - stories of treatment given to brown Indians in England came to mind.

However, there was more to this than met the eye. I somehow ended up chatting with an elderly white gentleman who also was an employee of the hotel. After exhausting 'normal' topics, I hesitantly brought up the topic of the behavior that I had seen, and asked him what the reason could be. He paused, and then said "I know that you are thinking that it is racism. However, that is not the case. It is due to some other reason."

On prodding further, he revealed that the strange behavior was because previous guests from India or the Indian subcontinent had acted badly while staying there.
Examples were:

Dirtying up the place by dropping paper, wrappers, food items, etc. in every place except the waste baskets.
Filling up the juice placed on the counter during breakfast into thermos flasks or other containers and taking it with them out of the breakfast hall.
Pushing the fire alarm button. This was usually done by kids, which by itself is not that unexpected. But the sad part was that when this was reported to the parents they would shrug their shoulders and say "Oh that's normal behavior for children!"
Deliberately giving the wrong room number when the bill is presented after a meal. This means that someone else staying in the hotel is charged for that meal.
Spitting in the hotel premises.
Talking loudly even at the dinner table when in the midst of others who were very quiet.

He had other examples as well. After hearing them, I was really ashamed of my fellow countrymen. I really could not blame the hotel staff for being apprehensive about all Indian tourists.

After that conversation, I remembered that I myself have seen examples of this during my travels abroad. It starts with the plane journey itself. We Indians shout, demand too much service, follow no table manners, rush for seats instead of waiting patiently in line, stuff all our luggage into the overhead bins without sparing a thought for whether other passengers have space to put even one item, etc. etc. And it continues at places where we jump queues (yes, the great Indian disease of cutting in lines travels with us abroad as well). No wonder we are disliked.

Most of those who can afford to travel abroad are educated people. If education can't teach you manners, then what is the use? Do we need to have common sense, civic sense and etiquette as part of our school curriculum? Is it really so hard for us to follow a simple rule - "Don't do anything that will trouble others"?

Why do people resist good manners so much? Do they fear that if they stand in line patiently they will miss out on something? That if they don't shout while eating they won't digest their food properly? That behaving in a civilized fashion will corrupt their moral values? :-)

Some questions have no answers. I can just hope and pray that we take some of the good things from the West like manners, punctuality, public behavior, etc. instead of copying the wrong ones...

What good are Steve Jobs and Bill Gates without Josh Silver?

2008-12-24T21:55:00.001-08:00

Josh Silver, a retired physics professor from Oxford University, has invented glasses with lenses that the wearer can adjust for his or herself. No need to go to an optometrist. This is perfect for poor people!!

He wants to find ways to give these glasses to the world's poor. Hope that someone funds this worthy project ...

Link: What good are Steve Jobs and Bill Gates without Josh Silver?

Creative photos by Chema Madoz

2008-12-24T21:06:00.001-08:00

A set of beautiful black and white artistic snaps.

Link: Creative photos by Chema Madoz | haha.nu - the lifestyle blogzine

Restaurant Review – Bagban (Camp), Pune

2008-12-14T08:06:00.001-08:00

Review – Bagban (Camp)

Went to this one on Friday, Dec 12, 2008.

The restaurant is on East Street, Camp – in front of the old Victory theatre. The first thing one notices is that the menu is also written on the walls. So that kind of gives an indication that food is the primary focus of the hotel - not ambience, decor, etc.

The seats are very plain. The place is also small but clean. There is an upper AC section but we preferred to sit in the normal one downstairs as there was a nice breeze blowing.

We had a few vegetarians in our group. The number of items for them were very limited. They ordered paneer tikka and promptly declared it delicious.

On the other hand, we non-vegetarians were spoilt for choice. Reshmi kababs, mutton seekh kabab, pahadi kababs, etc. – no fish items though. Only chicken or mutton.

For the main course, we went for

Ø Veg handi + Bakery Naan

Ø Mutton kheema + pav

Ø Tawa gosht

Ø Mutton biryani

The non-veg items were simply delicious! And following the general rule that healthy is inversely proportional to taste, the preparation did not seem at all healthy. But at times like this, you don’t really care!

I would rate the mutton biryani the best of the lot (and that is saying something considering that all the items were very good).

The veggie party declared the handi decent. The Bakery naan is a special item – it is a bread in the shape of a small pizza. Something different from the usual stuff.

All the prices are very reasonable. The total bill came for less than Rs 200/- per head.

Summary:

Ø It is a great place if you love chicken and mutton dishes.

Ø Value for money

Ø Not recommended for vegetarians (too less variety)

Ø If ambience matters a lot to you, then skip this one.

A few thoughts on the Mumbai attacks of 26 Nov 2008

2008-11-30T10:17:00.001-08:00

The past few days' events have filled me with a sense of sadness and gloom. There are so many thoughts going around in my mind that I just decided to "blog them away". So here goes - the list is not ordered, as it mirrors what I am thinking ...

When will our government learn?

This is not directed at any particular political party. I am pretty sure that had any other party other than the Congress(I) been in power, the end result would have been the same.

Our "leaders" are very reliable - you can rely on them to do anything other than the right thing. They play the politics of vote banks, communalism, casteism, reservation, etc. etc. - anything to avoid doing the right thing.

We do not have a comprehensive anti-terror policy. We do not have co-ordination amongst security agencies. We do not have proper equipment for our police forces.
We do not have anything other than the bravery of our armed forces who lay their lives down for our country selflessly. A country that does not even honor them enough.
Spend money on anti-terror freely and wisely.

News reports said that 100 policemen responded to the attacks immediately. But out of them only 7 had guns. The rest had lathis!! (canes)
Only 7% of the policemen had guns? Could there be anything more pathetic than this? In the US, each and every policeman/policewoman has a gun. That is more like it.

In India, most of the gun-toting policemen are sent to guard politicians. These politicians are mostly people who, if killed, would be more a reason for celebration than sadness!! Why can't we reduce the security of such goons-in-political-clothing?

The equipment that the police had was faulty. The bullet proof vests could not stop bullets from AK-47 rifles. Ditto for the helmets.
Instead of spending more money on foreign tours of our "leaders", it would be better to spend it on such items.

Another article said that the Navy did not get the money needed for effective patrolling of the sea coast. We have outdated radar, and outdated ships / less ships than required. This is disgusting!!
Choose the right men for the job.

Just now heard the news that the home minister, the "honorable" Mr. Shivraj Patil, has resigned and has been replaced. Too little, too late.

Mr. Patil should not have been made the home minister in the first place. A post that was held by stalwarts like Sardar Patel is now being held by people who change their dress 4 times during the day but don't do what they are supposed to.

Another colossal mistake that happened was that the NSG is situated only in Delhi. This meant that it was a good 9 hours before they could come to Mumbai. 9 hours!! If that had been reduced to 30 minutes, a lot of lives could have been saved ...

To take this to another level, we must choose the right people to man the security agencies. Make them co-ordinate with each other. Make sure that all information is given to all the concerned people.
Finally, please spare a thought for all the people who died in this dastardly attack. All the army and policemen who lost their lives. All the commandos who fought so bravely. All the innocent civilians who died an unnecessary death.

Rest in peace, my friends. Rest in peace.

Insensitivity never dies !!

2008-11-30T09:36:00.001-08:00

After the horrific terrorist attacks in Mumbai on 26-Nov-2008, once expects that others would be sensitive to this fact and respect those who lost their lives.

But no. Human nature never ceases to amaze me - both positively and negatively. In this case, it was the negative.

We live on Baner road in Pune. There are 2 marriage halls near our home. This being the marriage season, there were marriages held on Saturday (29 Nov ) and Sunday (30 Nov).

That the marriages were held is perfectly fine - life has to go on and you can't cancel an event that was organized a long time ago. But one did expect them to be sensitive to the fact that terrorists had wreaked havoc in a city that is less than 3 hrs away from Pune.
No such luck. Both times there was a band playing loud music that lasted for one hour!! Not 5 mins, 1 whole hour!! Amazing ...

2008-11-21T01:15:00.000-08:00

Footwear designed specifically for diabetics

A Pune, India based doctor – Dr. Manisha Deshmukh - has designed footwear specifically for diabetics as they are prone to suffer from a lot of foot related problems.

The article doesn’t mention where to buy the footwear, but I think she works at K.E.M. hospital --> http://kemhospital.org/diabetes.html

I have put the scanned article at http://www.flickr.com/photos/amitshirodkar/3046942477/sizes/l/

The 9/11 photograph you didn't see

2008-11-17T00:43:00.001-08:00

This article is 2 years old, and the snap is 7 years old. But still does it make a comment on the times we live in?

Link: The 9/11 photograph you didn't see. - - Slate Magazine

2008-11-11T01:15:00.000-08:00

New garbage collector G1 available in JDK7 / OpenJDK

Ø Snip from http://jeremymanson.blogspot.com/2008/11/g1-garbage-collector-in-latest-openjdk.html

G1 is supposed to provide a dramatic improvement on existing GCs. There was a rather good talk about it at this year's JavaOne. It allows the user to provide pause time goals, both in terms of actual seconds and in terms of percentage of runtime.

The principle is simple: the collector splits the heap up into fixed-size regions and tracks the live data in those regions. It keeps a set of pointers — the "remembered set" — into and out of the region. When a GC is deemed necessary, it collects the regions with less live data first (hence, "garbage first"). Often, this can mean collecting an entire region in one step: if the number of pointers into a region is zero, then it doesn't need to do a mark or sweep of that region.

Ø White paper describing the “Garbage-First Garbage Collection” algorithm: http://research.sun.com/jtech/pubs/04-g1-paper-ismm.pdf

Youtube - “We’re sorry, this video is no longer available”

2008-11-04T00:31:00.001-08:00

YouTube was pretty reliable - until now. Nowadays I frequently get the following error message for videos: “We’re sorry, this video is no longer available”.

Now this error message used to come for videos that had been removed from YouTube either by the uploader or the web site itself. But now it comes even for valid videos.

There is a fix for this (courtesy http://www.marcforrest.com/). For any video that gives such an error, append one of the following to the URL (in the browser's address bar)

&fmt=6
&fmt=16
&fmt=18

E.g.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AODycP1Y24M&feature=related
would become
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AODycP1Y24M&feature=related&fmt=6

Original Post:
Marc Forrest.com » Youtube - “We’re sorry, this video is no longer available”

Electing a US President in Plain English

2008-10-23T00:18:00.001-07:00

Very nice and simple video that explains the process by which a candidate is elected as the President of the US of A.

Link: YouTube - Electing a US President in Plain English

E-mail Etiquette 101

2008-10-16T01:34:00.001-07:00

In today's world, email is one of the top forms of communication. It makes sense to learn how to communicate via this medium effectively, especially in the corporate world.

Here's a nice list of dos and don'ts when writing emails: E-mail Etiquette 101 - Michael Hyatt

BTW, one rule not mentioned there: Do not overuse email. Sometimes an issue can be better solved with a face to face meeting or a talk over the phone.

Outlook command line switches

2008-10-14T04:59:00.001-07:00

Some useful command line switches for MS Outlook.

Link: Using Command lines

2008-10-08T02:55:00.001-07:00

Copernic Desktop 3 sucks!!

I am an avid fan of Copernic Desktop search. I use version 2 all the time and it works great!!

But recently I had the misfortune of upgrading to version 3. I quickly found out that it was a waste, for the following reasons:

Features have been removed from the free offering from version 2 to 3, such as
a) Find as you type (you now have to press Enter before the search gets executed)
b) Indexing network drives --> Now only local drives are indexed by the free version
The software crashes frequently. Once every 20 mins or so.

I know that the free version is well, free. And so the company has the right to give anything they want in it. But taking away features from a previous free version leaves a bitter taste in one's mouth. I guess they don't know the meaning of the word "upgrade".

And crashing so often - well that is just plain sad.

I have gone back to version 2. It works great!! I luckily did not clear out my index when uninstalling ver 3 before installing ver 2, so it works just as before.

If other search tools improve, I will switch. But I am definitely not "upgrading" to any new version of Copernic Desktop search.

Link: http://www.copernic.com/en/products/desktop-search/index.html

Using Microsoft Outlook to Schedule Report Transmissions

2008-10-07T04:06:00.001-07:00

A programmatic way to send recurring mails via Outlook (mails that are same in content and have to be sent periodically)

Link: Using Microsoft Outlook to Schedule Report Transmissions

Jeeves and Wooster Quotes Page

2008-10-07T03:51:00.001-07:00

A bunch of quotes from the Jeeves series by P.G. Wodehouse. Enjoy!!

Link: Jeeves and Wooster Quotes Page

NASA: 2 space shuttles on nearby launch pads simultaneously

2008-09-28T22:54:00.001-07:00

You might not get to see this again, at least not for many years...

<SNIPPET_FROM_NASA_SITE>
Space shuttle Atlantis (foreground) sits on Launch Pad A and Endeavour
on Launch Pad B at NASA's Kennedy Space Center in Florida. At the left
of each shuttle are the open rotating service structures with the
payload changeout rooms revealed. The rotating service structures
provide protection for weather and access to the shuttle.

For
the first time since July 2001, two shuttles are on the launch pads at
the same time. Endeavour will stand by at pad B in the unlikely event
that a rescue mission is necessary during Atlantis' upcoming STS-125
mission to repair NASA's Hubble Space Telescope. The missions is slated
to launch Oct. 10.

After Endeavour is cleared from its duty
as a rescue spacecraft, it will be moved to Launch Pad 39A for its
STS-126 mission to the International Space Station. That flight is
targeted for launch Nov. 12.
</SNIPPET_FROM_NASA_SITE>

Link: NASA - Mirror Images

Image below. It is beautiful!!

Choosing the next CEO: Nice story

2008-09-23T03:32:00.001-07:00

Got this nice story in the mail ...

A successful business man was growing old and knew it was time to choose a successor to take over the business. Instead of choosing one of his directors or his children, he decided to do something different.

He called all the young executives in his company together. He said, 'It is time for me to step down and choose the next CEO.I have decided to choose one of you'

The young executives were shocked, but the boss continued. 'I am going to give each one of you a SEED today - one very special SEED.

I want you to plant the seed, water it, and come back here one year from today with what you have grown from the seed I have given you. I will then judge the plants that you bring, and the one I choose will be the next CEO'

One man, named Jim, was there that day and he, like the others, received a seed. He went home and excitedly, told his wife the story. She helped him get a pot, soil and compost and he planted the seed. Everyday, he would water it and watch to see if it had grown.

After about three weeks, some of the other executives began to talk about their seeds and the plants that were beginning to grow. Jim kept checking his seed, but nothing ever grew. Three weeks, four weeks, five weeks went by, still nothing.

By now, others were talking about their plants, but Jim didn't have a plant and he felt like a failure.
Six months went by--still nothing in Jim's pot. He just knew he had killed his seed. Everyone else had trees and tall plants, but he had nothing.

Jim didn't say anything to his colleagues, however. He just kept watering and fertilizing the soil -
He so wanted the seed to grow.

A year finally went by and all the young executives of the company brought their plants to the CEO for inspection.

Jim told his wife that he wasn't going to take an empty pot. But she asked him to be honest about what happened. Jim felt sick at his stomach, it was going to be the most embarrassing moment of his life, but he new his wife was right.

He took his empty pot to the board room. When Jim arrived, he was amazed at the variety of plants grown by the other executives. They were beautiful--in all shapes and sizes. Jim put his empty pot on the floor and many of his colleagues laughed, a few felt sorry for him!

When the CEO arrived, he surveyed the room and greeted his young executives.

Jim just tried to hide in the back. 'My, what great plants, trees, and flowers you have grown,' said the CEO 'Today one of you will be appointed the next CEO!'

All of a sudden, the CEO spotted Jim at the back of the room with his empty pot. He ordered the financial director to bring him to the front. Jim was terrified. He thought, 'The CEO knows I'm a failure! Maybe he will have me fired!' When Jim got to the front, the CEO asked him what had happened to his seed - Jim told him the story.

The CEO asked everyone to sit down except Jim. He looked at Jim, and then announced to the young executives, 'Behold your next Chief Executive! His name is Jim!' Jim couldn't believe it. Jim couldn't even grow his seed. How could he be the new CEO the others said?

Then the CEO said, 'One year ago today, I gave everyone in this room a seed. I told you to take the seed, plant it, water it, and bring it back to me today. But I gave you all boiled seeds; they were dead - it was not possible for them to grow.

All of you, except Jim, have brought me trees and plants and flowers. When you found that the seed would not grow, you substituted another seed for the one I gave you.

Jim was the only one with the courage and honesty to bring me a pot with my seed in it. Therefore, he is the one who will be the new Chief Executive!'

If you plant honesty, you will reap trust

If you plant goodness, you will reap friends

If you plant humility, you will reap greatness

If you plant perseverance, you will reap contentment

If you plant consideration, you will reap perspective

If you plant hard work, you will reap success

If you plant forgiveness, you will reap reconciliation

If you plant faith in God, you will reap a harvest

So, be careful what you plant now; it will determine what you will reap later.

Hidden Emoticons - Yahoo! Messenger

2008-09-23T03:23:00.001-07:00

For Yahoo! messenger --> You won't find these in the emoticon menu, but you can send them by typing the keyboard shortcuts directly into your message.

Link: Hidden Emoticons - Yahoo! Messenger

2008-09-21T23:06:00.001-07:00

I use Firefox as my default browser. It's great, and has a lot of cool features. But it loads up very sloooooooooowwwly!!

To avoid the pain, a couple of things to try:

Turn off automatic updates: FF checks for updates (to itself, to plugins and to search engines) very time you start it. This makes it very slow. So turning off automatic updates makes it very fast. To turn them off go to Tools --> Options --> Advanced --> Update check off all the Automatic Update checkboxes.

Use FF Preloader --> https://sourceforge.net/projects/ffpreloader/.
This pre-loads parts of FF into memory (RAM) and hence speeds it up.
Note: There are folks who caution against doing this - it may cause FF to malfunction. I have not tried this myself.

Links:

Tip about Automatic Updates: http://geekzguru.wordpress.com/2008/09/14/howto-speed-up-firefox-startup/
FF Preloader tip: http://www.techiecorner.com/48/speed-up-firefox-start-up-time-with-firefox-preloader/

2008-09-18T02:30:00.000-07:00

Joke: Ten Jew Berry Mud

Old but gold joke…

The following telephone exchange between room-service and a guest at a hotel in Asia was recorded and published in the Far East Economic Review.

Hotel: Morny, ruin sorbees.

Guest: Sorry, I thought I dialed room-service.

Hotel: Rye! Ruin sorbees ... morny! Jewish to odor sunteen??

Guest: Uh ... yes ... I'd like some bacon and eggs.

Hotel: Ow July den?

Guest: What??

Hotel: Ow July den ... pry, boy, pooch?

Guest: Oh, the eggs! How do I like them? Sorry, scrambled please.

Hotel: Ow July dee baychem ... crease?

Guest: Crisp will be fine.

Hotel: Hokay. An San tos?

Guest: What?

Hotel: San tos. July San tos?

Guest: I don't think so.

Hotel: No? Judo one toes?

Guest: I feel really bad about this, but I don't know what 'judo onetoes' means.

Hotel: Toes! Toes! ... Why djew Don Juan toes? Ow bow singlishmopping we bother?

Guest: English muffin!! I've got it! You were saying 'Toast.' Fine. Yes, an English muffin will be fine.

Hotel: We bother?

Guest: No, just put the bother on the side.

Hotel: Wad?

Guest: I mean butter ... just put it on the side.

Hotel: Copy?

Guest: Sorry?

Hotel: Copy ... tea ... mill?

Guest: Yes. Coffee please, and that's all.

Hotel: One Minnie. Ass strangle ache, creasebaychem, tossy singlish mopping we bother honey sigh, and copy... rye?

Guest: Whatever you say.

Hotel: Ten jew berry mud.

Guest: You're welcome.

Firefox add-on: ScribeFire Blog Editor

2008-09-15T05:13:00.001-07:00

Blog to a variety of sites such as Blogger, WordPress, LiveJournal, Windows Live Spaces, etc. right from within the Firefox browser.

Really cool - I use this one regularly. Most of my posts are via this tool.

Note: They have a feature where you can make money via ads, but I have't used that. I only use the pure blogging part.

Link to Firefox add-on: ScribeFire Blog Editor :: Firefox Add-ons

List of supported services/sites: http://blog.scribefire.com/help/supported-services/

New browser - Google Chrome

2008-09-03T07:56:00.001-07:00

Google has come out with a new browser, Google Chrome.
The browser is now ready for download. Try it out ...

Download link: Google Chrome
For some reason, this download link works only in IE for me, not in Firefox. Coincidence? ;-)

2008-07-31T08:19:00.001-07:00

How to find Uptime for a Windows machine

I have used Microsoft Windows for a long time now. But the other day when someone asked me how to find out the uptime for a Windows machine (how much time the machine has been running), I was stumped :-).

A little bit of Googling has revealed 2 ways to do this.

Open a command prompt. (Start --> Run --> cmd).
Type "net statistics server" and press "Enter".
The line that start with "Statistics since …" provides the time that the server was up from.
Open a command prompt.
Type systeminfo | find "Up Time". You get the uptime.

Links:

2008-06-19T08:49:00.000-07:00

Quotable Quotes

1. Tears are the safety valve of the heart when too much pressure is laid on it.

-- Albert Richard Smith, author and entertainer (1816-1860)

2. Conscience is a mother-in-law whose visit never ends.

-- H. L. Mencken

3. People often find it easier to be a result of the past than a cause of the future.

-- Unknown

4. No one can guarantee the actions of another.

-- Spock, "Day of the Dove", stardate unknown

5. Man is the only animal that can remain on friendly terms with the victims he intends to eat until he eats them.

-- Samuel Butler (1835-1902)

6. The reasonable man adapts himself to the world;

the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself.

Therefore all progress depends on the unreasonable man.

-- George Bernard Shaw, Nobel laureate(1856-1950)

7. Hating people is like burning down your own house to get rid of a rat.

-- Henry Emerson Fosdick

8. Conquest is easy. Control is not.

-- Kirk, "Mirror, Mirror", stardate unknown

9. They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety.

-- Benjamin Franklin, 1759

10. It's not the size of the dog in the fight,

it's the size of the fight in the dog.

-- Mark Twain

2008-06-15T07:17:00.001-07:00

Got this in a forwarded mail ...

There's an English proverb that
goes: "One father is worth more than a hundred schoolmasters."

Fathers can teach their children many important lessons. Father's Day is Sunday, June 15, and it brings to mind
some of the valuable lessons I learned from my father, Jack Mackay. I've shared
many of them with you in my books and columns, but here they are, in one nice
package, for the 64.3 million fathers out there.

My dad headed the Associated Press in St. Paul, Minn., for many years. He lived by deadlines. When he told
his 10-year-old fishing partner, "Be at the dock at 7:30 a.m." and I arrived at
7:35, I would be holding my fishing pole in one hand and waving bon voyage with
the other. Time management 101.

When I began my career selling envelopes, I asked my father how I could make twice as much money as my fellow
sales reps.

He asked me how many sales calls my peers made every day. I told him that everyone made about five calls a day,
and I could match them call for call.

"No good," he said. "Do what they do and you'll make what they make. Figure out how you can get to 10 calls a
day and your income will double."

We worked out a game plan, which became a life plan. I learned when the buyers were in the office and worked
according to their schedules, which sometimes meant anytime from 6 a.m.-8 p.m.
and Saturday mornings. I quit making cold calls, was among the first to get a
cell phone and learned many other time management tips from my
father.

TRUST is the most important five-letter word in business and in life. When I was only eight years old, he
said: "Son, would you like to learn a lesson that might save your life some day?"

"Sure I would, Dad," I answered.

"Just slide down the banister and I'll catch you," he urged.

I slid ... and landed on the carpet. As I dusted myself off, he announced, "Never trust anyone completely.
Keep your eyes open and your wits about you."

Similarly, my father encouraged me at a young age to keep track of all the people I met on Rolodex cards, now on
my computer. He was a master networker. He knew where to get stories, much like
I learned where to get sales.

Maybe the most important lesson my father taught me was that your best network will develop from what you do
best. In my case that was golf. When I joined the sales game after college,
where I had been a varsity golfer at the University of Minnesota, my father
suggested I join Oak Ridge Country Club, which I couldn't afford. Because Oak
Ridge was historically at the bottom of the city golf league, I offered to play
for them and try to win them a championship. Six months and numerous meetings
later, I was admitted to the club where I gained access to many of the major
companies around town.

My father also taught me that the big name on the door doesn't mean diddly. You have to know who the decision makers are.

In addition, he warned me
against telling anyone how I vote. That's why it's a secret ballet. The Democrats think I'm a Republican, and the Republicans believe I'm a Democrat.

My father's greatest
professional attribute was his nose for a good story and his indefatigable zeal
in getting it. He taught me the same desire, determination and persistence for
sales.

After a skiing accident that
landed me in the hospital for 35 days in neck traction, he told me, "You can take any amount of pain as long as you know it's going to end."

My father taught me many more life lessons, among them:

They don't pay off on effort . . . they pay off on results.
No one ever choked to death swallowing his
pride.
He who burns his bridges better be a damn good
swimmer.
Education is like exercise. As soon as you quit
you begin to lose the benefits.
It's hard to soar like an eagle when you're
dressed like a turkey.
If you win say little. If you lose say
less.
We are judged by what we finish, not by what we
start.

2008-06-05T01:25:00.001-07:00

Got this as a forwarded mail. So true ....

London Times Obituary of the late Mr.
Common Sense - Sunday, 31st March 2008

Today we mourn the passing
of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No
one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in
bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable
lessons as: Knowing when to come in out of the rain; why the early bird gets the
worm; Life isn't always fair; and maybe it was my fault.

Common Sense
lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn)
and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).

His health
began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations
were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment
for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after
lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his
condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for
doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly
children.

It declined even further when schools were required to get
parental consent to administer sun lotion or an Bandaid to a student; but could
not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an
abortion.

Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments
became contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better
treatment than their victims. Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't
defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you
for assault.

Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman
failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in
her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was
preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his
daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason.

He is survived by his 4
half brothers; I Know My Rights, I Want It Now, Someone Else Is To Blame, and
I'm A Victim.

Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he
was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on.

2008-05-26T01:37:00.001-07:00

How to download videos from YouTube (Firefox)

Most of us watch videos at YouTube. If you want to download some of the ones you like, then here’s how.

Note: The downloading steps only work on Firefox. For other browsers, you will need to find out on your own.

Steps:

1. Install the VideoDownloader extension from

https://addons.mozilla.org/en-US/firefox/addon/2390

2. Go to YouTube and pick the page of the video you want to download, e.g.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wP-TwHwLc98

3. Click the VideoDownloader icon at the bottom right of the Firefox window (status bar). You should see something like this:

4. Click “Download”

5. The file name will be “get_video”. Rename it to e.g. music_video.flv. The .FLV extension is important.

6. Play the .FLV file using an FLV player. 2 free ones (Windows) are:

v http://www.rivavx.com/index.php?id=422

v http://www.wimpyplayer.com/products/wimpy_standalone_flv_player.html (this one has a Mac version too)

NTLM Authentication and Firefox

2008-05-16T00:13:00.001-07:00

If you are a Firefox user who is tired of entering the Windows password again and again for your intranet sites, then this is a must read.

I set both the keys required - I don't know if only 1 is sufficient. But it works!!

Link: Patrick Cauldwell's Blog - Firefox and Sharepoint

2008-02-28T07:43:00.001-08:00

Got this great joke in my mailbox ...

A to Z of being Punjabi.

A is for Adjust. Punjabis will always ask you to adjust whenever they want to push you around.

B is for Backside, and it has nothing to do with your bum, it is an instruction to go to the rear of a building, or block, or shop or whatever.

C is for Cloney and its not a process for replicating sheep, nor is its first name George. It is merely an area where people live e.g. ... "Dfence Cloney".

D is for Dilliwallas that live in Dfence Cloney

E is for Expanditure. Punjabis are never shy of spending money ¡V the latest cars, gadgets, marble floors: their ambitions are always expanding.

F is for Fackade, and even though it sounds like a bad word it is actually just the front of a building (with backside being the back, of course).

G is for Gaddi, and the way a Punjabi can pilot his gaddi puts any F1 driver to shame. (If the Grand Prix does come to Delhi there's no way Hamilton, Alonso or Kimi can overtake Balvinder, Jasvinder or Sukhvinder.)

H is for Ho Jayega Ji, and the moment you hear that you have to be careful because you can be reasonably sure it's not going to happen.

I is for Intezaar, and to know more about it see P.

J is for Jindagi, and if there's one person who knows how to live life to the fullest it's a Punjabi.

K is for Khanna, Khurana, etc, the Punjabi equivalent of the Joneses (e.g."Keeping up with the Khuranas")

L is for Lovely, but unfortunately she almost never is. Nor is Sweety. She is usually married with kids.

M is for Mrooti, the car that an entire generation of Punjabis were in love with.

N is for No Problem Ji. To find out how that works see H.

O is for Oye, which can be surprise (Oyye!), a greeting (Oyy!), anger (OYY!) or pain (Oy oy oy...).

P is for Panch Minit, and no matter how near (1 km) or far (100 km) a Punjabi is from you he always says he'll reach you in panch minit.

Q is for Queue, a word completely untranslateable into Punjabi.

R is for Riks, and a Punjabi is always prepared to take one, even if the odds are against him.

S is for Sweetie, Bunty, Pappu and Sonu, who seem to own half the cars in Delhi.

T is for the official bird of Punjab: Tandoori chicken.

U is for when you lose your sex appeal and become "Uncle-ji"

V is for VIP phone numbers @ Rs 15 lakh and counting.

W is for Whan, as in "Whan are you coming, ji?"

X is for the many X-rated words that flow freely in all Punjabi conversations.

Y is for "You nonsense", when anger replaces vocabulary in a shouting match.

Z is for Zigzag. (Please refer to G, M and P)

This was sent to me by a Sardarji friend of mine.

Moral of the story:

Unlike most other communities who take instant offence, they can have a hearty laugh at themselves.

Cheers to that!!

2008-02-20T23:10:00.001-08:00

Reverse AJAX : Comet

Comet is basically Reverse Ajax --> for streaming data from the server using a server-side push mechanism.
Needs server side support as well. But a good idea nevertheless ...

Link:
Continuing Intermittent Incoherency » Comet: Low Latency Data for the Browser

Everything You Ever Really Needed to Know About Personal Finance on the Back of Five Business Cards

2007-12-19T23:25:00.001-08:00

Very nice article. Simply written but very useful.

Link: Everything You Ever Really Needed to Know About Personal Finance ...

2007-12-10T01:23:00.001-08:00

[Original]: Review of Manorama - Six Feet Under

Summary: Slow movie, but liked it.
Cast : Abhay Deol, Raima Sen, Gul Panag, Sarika, Kulbhushan Kharbanda
Director: Navdeep Singh

Satyaveer or SV (Abhay Deol) is a government engineer leading a drab and dreary existence in a small town in Rajasthan. He has a nagging wife (Gul Panag) who is frustrated by his lack
of success. Abhay's real passion is writing detective fiction. He writes a novel called Manorama that flops badly.

A mysterious lady (Sarika) with the same name as the novel comes into his life. She asks him to spy on her husband, a local and powerful politician (Kulbhushan Kharbanda). From
then on his life gets caught into a maze of mysteries - big and small.

Sarika gets murdered. Then it turns out that Sarika is not the politician's wife. The politician has an illegitimate daughter who is demanding that he recognize her. She and her boyfriend (the politician's personal doctor) are brutally murdered. Abhay is threatened by a couple of goons working for Kulbhushan for some photographs.
A cop (Vinay Pathak) who is Abhay's brother-in-law, is his only source of help, and even he can't do much as the politician is powerful.

Raima Sen is the murdered daughter's room mate. She and Abhay are subject to many twists and turns as the story unfolds.

The obvious questions -
1. Who was Sarika? Why was she murdered?
2. What is the link between the murders of Sarika and that of the illegitimate daughter?
3. What is in the photos?

The suspense is good but not outstanding - all questions are reasonably guessable while watching the movie. But what I liked was the simplicity and realism of the movie. Right down to Abhay's unpolished shoes, there has been a conscious effort to make sure everything is as real as possible. The dry and arid desert was used as a very good metaphor for Abhay's dull
existence.

The film pays attention to the relationships between Abhay and different characters - Gul, Raima and Vinay. No songs. It is more like an art film than the usual fare.

Performances:
Vinay Pathak has some of the best lines, but still has too small a role to make a big impact. Raima Sen is good.
Gul Panag did the nagging act well.
Kulbhushan - as good as ever.
Sarika - competent (but again has a pretty small role).

Abhay Deol is the main character and he does justice to the role. I had not liked him in some of
his earlier performances, but now he has moved to the +ve side for me.

Negative points:
1. Slow pace.
2. Gaps in writing as far as scenes or continuity is concerned.

Overall, worth a watch.

Windows: Your computer may randomly play Classical Music

2007-12-09T22:07:00.001-08:00

Microsoft does its very best to entertain you as well as improve your "class".
Classical music on your PC:

Microsoft Link: Computer Randomly Plays Classical Music

Beware of Garbage Trucks!™

2007-11-22T01:46:00.001-08:00

Very nice article.
From this link : " Beware of Garbage Trucks!™ - The Law of ...

Beware of Garbage Trucks

By David J. Pollay

How often do you let other people's nonsense
change your mood?

Do you let a bad driver, rude waiter,
curt boss, or an insensitive employee ruin your day? Unless you're the
Terminator, for an instant you're probably set back on your heels.
However, the mark of a successful person is how quickly one can get back their
focus on what's important.

Sixteen years ago I learned this lesson. I
learned it in the back of a New York City taxi cab. Here's what happened.

I hopped in a taxi, and we took off for
Grand Central Station. We were driving in the right lane when, all of a sudden,
a black car jumped out of a parking space right in front of us. My taxi driver
slammed on his breaks, skidded, and missed the other car's back end by just
inches!

The driver of the other car, the guy who
almost caused a big accident, whipped his head around and he started yelling bad
words at us. My taxi driver just smiled and waved at the guy. And I mean, he was
friendly. So, I said, "Why did you just do that? This guy almost ruined your car
and sent us to the hospital!"

And this is when
my taxi driver told me what I now
call, "The Law of the Garbage Truck."

"Many people are like garbage trucks.
They run around full of garbage, full of frustration, full of anger, and full of
disappointment. As their garbage piles up, they need a place to dump it. And
if you let them, they'll dump it on you. When someone wants to dump on you, don't take it
personally. You just smile, wave, wish them well, and move on. You'll be
happy you did."

So this was it: The "Law of the Garbage
Truck." I started thinking, how often do I let Garbage Trucks run right over me?
And how
often do I take their garbage and spread it to other people: at work, at home,
on the streets? It was that day I said, "I'm not going to do it
anymore."

I began to see garbage trucks. Like in the
movie "The Sixth Sense," the little boy said, "I see Dead People." Well, now "I
see Garbage Trucks." I see the load they're carrying. I see them coming to drop
it off. And like my Taxi Driver, I don't make it a personal thing; I just smile,
wave, wish them well, and I move on.

One of my favorite football players of all
time, Walter Payton, did this every day on the football field. He would jump up
as quickly as he hit the ground after being tackled. He never dwelled on a hit.
Payton was ready to make the next play his best.
Good leaders know they have to be
ready for their next meeting.

Good parents know that they have to
welcome their children home from school with hugs and kisses. Leaders and
parents know that they have to be fully present, and at their best for the
people they care about.

The bottom line is that successful people do
not let Garbage Trucks take over their day.

What about you? What would happen in your
life, starting today, if you let more garbage trucks pass you by?

Here's my bet. You'll be happier.

Life's too short to wake up in the morning
with regrets. Love the people who treat you right. Forget about the ones who
don't. Believe that everything happens for a reason. If you get a chance ,
TAKE IT! If it changes your life , LET IT!

Nobody said it would be easy… they just
promised it would be worth it!

____

I have sometimes wasted my mental CPU
cycles, trying to analyze my interaction with some people who were simply
unloading their garbage.

Of course, like other inspiring thoughts, it
needs to be applied judiciously. This is not a prescription to ignore feedback
from others when we don't like it. Or to be insensitive to another's plight.
Just to move on and spend energy on the next step forward.

2007-11-19T01:04:00.001-08:00

[Original]: Review of Saawariya

It is now too late to save many people (including myself), but here's my review of Saawariya.

1. The title should have been SaBOREiya.

The movie is amazingly boring. At no point of time did I feel interested in what was going on.
The predominant thought that I during the movie had was regarding the money we wasted on tickets.

2. The main characters are a demented couple.
Neither of them has much logic to offer. Now love is beyond logic and all that, but still one is supposed to have some logic at all times.
Ranbir Kapoor has a "boxing your way out of grief" theory. Sonam Kapoor breaks into demented laughter from time to time. She has fallen in love with Salman – absolutely no reason given other than the fact that he stayed at her home. Instant coffee, and now Instant Love!! Show up at a girl’s doorstep during rain, grimace and stare at her, and win her heart!!

Both of the actors (Ranbir and Sonam) seem to be decent in acting. But the script and the dialogues that are given to them are so pathetic that they can't do anything. If both of these folks want to make a mark in the Indian Film Industry, I suggest they stay as far away from Sanjay Leela Bhansali as possible.

3. The side characters try to save the movie, but fail.
Zohra Sehgal (good as always) and even Rani Mukherjee have their good moments and provide some relief.
But since they are not the main characters of the film, they can't do much. What could anyone do about this turkey?

Salman Khan has a tiny role where he shows a grim face (perhaps because he guessed the fate of the movie during shooting itself), and says some weird dialogues like "Main mulk ka (secret) kaam karta hoon". Since the entire movie set is a fantasy land, I guess his country and work are also equally imaginary.

4. The sets, lighting and casting are weird/pathetic/psycho.
The whole set is pale blue. The women (a city of at least 60% prostitutes) wear various shades of blue. I think they got a group discount on blue clothing.

Almost all shots are at night in dim lighting. By the time the movie finishes, your mood has turned blue also.

The fantasy city is partly Venice, partly old city look and wholly weird.

The streets have designer potholes where Sonam and Ranbir can jump stylishly and then do "grief boxing".

There are approximately 7 males in the entire city, counting Ranbir and Salman (who is a visitor anyway).

Rain pours like a tap and shuts like a tap being closed, hence proving that it was filmy rain coming out of a tap anyway.

5. Sanjay Leela Bhansali thoroughly disappoints.
You find it hard to believe that this is the man who gave us a great movie like Black, and a very nice love story like Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam.

I think throughout the shooting of the film, he was stoned/drugged. Which is the only reason that one can think of regarding the final output.
This would also explain the sets, lighting and casting.

P.S. The story of the movie is:
Ranbir meets Sonam and falls in love with her. But Sonam is waiting for Salman. Who will get the girl in the end?

Answer: Well before the movie ends, the public says "Either Salman or Ranbir can get Sonam, we don't mind - but please end this movie (and our suffering) quickly!!

More P.S.:
Somebody should have boxed Sanjay Leela Bhansali's ears (and other body parts) for making this movie. There is no way you can "grief box" your way out of this one.

Java: String class leaks memory

2007-10-21T23:01:00.001-07:00

Java is also capable of inadvertent memory leaks.

Link: Xebia Blog

2007-10-16T23:11:00.000-07:00

Rules for Hotel C Park Inn, Delhi, India

See the highlighted one ….

Misbah jokes (Twenty20 cricket final)

2007-09-25T23:12:00.001-07:00

Got these on email ....

Knock Knock !!

Who’s there?

Misbah.

Misbah who?

Mis bah 5 runs!!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Misbah’s mistake:

Misbah thought he was hitting where there was no one. He didnt know that
there is a Malayali in every corner of the world!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Do You Recognize These 10 Mental Blocks to Creative Thinking?

2007-09-21T05:10:00.001-07:00

Very nice article. Go read it.

Link:

Do You Recognize These 10 Mental Blocks to Creative Thinking? | Copyblogger

Joke: The Atheist

2007-09-20T22:23:00.001-07:00

An atheist was taking a walk through the woods "What majestic trees!
What powerful rivers! What beautiful animals!" he said to himself. As he
continued walking alongside the river he heard a rustling in the bushes.
Turning to look, he saw a 7 foot grizzly charging towards him.

He ran as fast as he could up the path. Looking over his shoulder he saw
that the bear was closing in on him. His heart was pumping frantically
and he tried to run even faster.

He tripped and fell on the ground. He rolled over to pick himself up but
saw the bear raising his paw to take a swipe at him. At that instant the
atheist cried out: " Oh my God..."

Time stopped.

The bear froze.

The forest was silent.

It was then that a bright light shone down upon the man and a voice came
out of the sky saying: "You deny my existence for all of these years,
teach others I don't exist, and even credit creation to a cosmic
accident. Do you expect me to help you out of this predicament? Am I to
count you as a believer?"

The atheist looked directly into the light, "It would be hypocritical of
me to suddenly ask you to treat me as a Christian now, but perhaps,
could you make the bear a Christian?"

"Very well," said the voice.

The light went out.

And the sounds of the forest resumed.

Then the bear lowered his paw, bowed his head and spoke:
"Lord, bless this food which I am about to receive and for which I am truly thankful.
Amen."

A guy walks into a bar ...

2007-09-18T04:24:00.001-07:00

The longest list of bar jokes that I got in an email ...

No one knows when the first joke beginning with the
six words "A guy walks
into a bar . . ." was told, or how it went.
Nevertheless, an entire genre of
jokes has been created revolving around that opening
scenario. Here's a
sampling of some of the variants that have sprung
up, many now involving
animals or inanimate objects:

A guy walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under
his arm and says, "A
beer please, and one for the road."

An amnesiac walks into a bar and asks the bartender,
"Do I come here often?"

A guy with dyslexia walks into a bra.

A young Texan walks into a bar and orders a drink.
"Got any ID?" asks the
bartender. The Texan replies, "About what?"

A pair of battery jumper cables walk into a bar. The
bartender says, "You
can come in here, but you better not start
anything!"

A Latin scholar walks into a bar and says, "I'll
have a martinus." The
bartender asks him. "Don't you mean martini?" The
man tells the bartender,
"Listen, if I wanted two or more drinks I would have
asked for them."

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "So,
why the long face?" A
variant on this joke during the 2004 presidential
campaign substituted John
Kerry for the horse, but the punch line remains the
same.

A penguin walks into a bar and asks the bartender,
"Has my father been in
here?" The bartender says, "I don't know. What does
he look like?"

A brain goes into a bar and says to the bartender,
"I'll have a beer,
please." The bartender says, "Sorry, I can't serve
you. You're out of your
head."

A little pig goes into a bar and orders ten drinks.
He finishes them and the
bartender says, "Don't you want to know where the
toilet is?" The pig says,
"No, thanks, I go wee-wee-wee all the way home."

René Descartes is in a bar at closing time. The
bartender asks him if he'd
like another drink. Descartes says, "I think not,"
and he disappears.

A bear walks into a bar and says, "I'd like a beer
and . . . . a packet of
peanuts. The barman says, why the big pause?"

A kangaroo walks into a bar and orders a beer. The
bartender says, "That'll
be $10. You know, we don't get many kangaroos coming
in here." The kangaroo
says, "At $10 a beer, it's not hard to understand."

A termite walks into a bar and asks, "Is the bar
tender here?"

A cheeseburger walks into a bar, and the bartender
says, "Sorry, we don't
serve food in here."

A dog with his foot wrapped in a bloody bandage
hobbles into a Western
saloon. He sidles up to the bar and announces: "I'm
lookin' fer the man that
shot my paw."

A baby seal walks into a bar. "What can I get you?"
asks the bartender.
"Anything but a Canadian Club," replies the seal.

A grasshopper hops into a bar. The bartender says,
"You're quite a celebrity
around here. We've even got a drink named after
you." The grasshopper says,
"You've got a drink named Steve?"

A goldfish flops into a bar and looks at the
bartender. The bartender asks,
"What can I get you?" The goldfish says, "Water."

A guy walks into a bar and sits down next to a lady
and a dog. The man asks,
"Does your dog bite?" The lady answers, "Never!" The
man reaches out to pet
the dog, and the dog bites his hand. The man says,
"I thought you said your
dog doesn't bite!" The woman replies, "He doesn't.
That's not my dog."

A guy walks into a bar. A horse behind the bar
serving drinks. The guy is
just staring at the horse, when the horse says,
"What are you staring at?
Haven't you ever seen a horse serving drinks
before?" The guy says,
"Honestly, no. I never thought the parrot would sell
the place."

A skeleton walks into a bar. The bartender asks,
"What'll you have?" The
skeleton says, "Give me a beer, and a mop."

A polar bear, a giraffe and a penguin walk into a
bar. The bartender says,
"What is this, some kind of joke?"

A guy walks into a bar in Cork, in Ireland, and asks
the barman: "What's the
quickest way to get to Dublin?" "Are you walking or
driving?" asks the
barman. "Driving," says a man. "That's the quickest
way," says the barman.

A fellow walks into a pub near Buckingham Palace in
London, sits down, and
says, "Give me a beer. I've had a rough day at
work." And the bartender
says, "Oh? What do you do?" The guy says, "I take
care of the corgis--you
know, the dogs the royal family owns." The bartender
asks, "Tough job, huh?
The guy says, "Yeah. All that inbreeding has led to
low intelligence and bad
temperaments. And the dogs aren't too smart,
either."

A man goes into a bar and says, "Give me a drink
before the trouble starts."
And the bartender pours him a drink. He drinks it
and says, "Give me another
drink before the trouble starts." He downs that one
and says quotation mark,
give me another drink before the trouble starts."
Finally, the bartender
asks, "Just when is this trouble going to start?"
The man says, "The trouble
starts just as soon as I tell you that I don't have
any money."

A tourist goes into a bar where a dog is sitting in
a chair playing poker.
He asks, "Is that dog there really playing poker?"
And the bartender says,
"Yeah, but he's not too smart. Whenever he has a
good hand, he starts
wagging his tail."

This cowboy walks into a bar and orders a beer. His
hat is made of brown
wrapping paper. And so are his shirt, vest, chaps,
pants, and boots. His
spurs are also made of paper. Pretty soon, the
sheriff arrives and arrests
him for rustling.

A guy goes into a bar, orders four shots of the most
expensive 30-year-old
single malt Scotch whisky and downs them one after
the other. The bartender
says, "You seem to be in a great hurry." The guy
says, "You would be too if
you had what I have." The bartender asks, "What have
you got? "Fifty cents,"
is the reply.

A Northerner walks into a bar in the Deep South
around Christmas time. A
small nativity scene is behind the bar, and the guy
says, "That's a nice
nativity scene. But how come the three wise men are
all wearing firemen's
hats?" And the bartender says, "Well, it says right
there in the Bible--the
three wise men came from afar."

A man walked into a bar, sat down, and ordered a
beer. As he sipped the
beer, he heard a voice say, "Nice tie." Looking
around, he saw that the bar
was empty except for him and the bartender. A few
sips later, another voice
said, "Beautiful shirt." At this, the man calls the
bartender over. "Say, I
must be losing my mind," he tells him. "I keep
hearing these voices say nice
things, and there is not a soul in here but us."
"It's the peanuts,"
explains the bartender, indicating a dish on the
bar. "The peanuts?" "That's
right, the peanuts--they' re complementary. "

A man walks into a bar with a giraffe. He says, "A
beer for me and one for
my giraffe." And they stand around drinking for
hours until the giraffe
passes out on the floor. The man pays the tab and
gets up to leave. The
bartender says, "Hey! You're not going to leave that
lyin' on the floor, are
you?" The man says, "That's not a lion, it's a
giraffe."

A guy walks into a bar with a German shepherd dog.
The bartender says, "Hey
buddy, can't you read that sign? It says no dogs
allowed! Get that mutt out
of here!" The man replies, "No, I can't read the
sign--I'm blind, and this
is my Seeing Eye dog." The bartender is embarrassed
and gives the man a beer
on the house. Later that day, the man tells his
friend about it: "I told him
I was blind, and I got a free beer!" The friend then
takes his dog into the
bar and sits down. The bartender says, "The sign
says no dogs allowed!
You'll have to leave!" The friend says, "Sorry, I
can't see the sign because
I'm blind, and this is my Seeing Eye dog." The
bartender replies, "Since
when do they give out Chihuahuas as Seeing Eye
dogs?" The man says, "They
gave me a Chihuahua?"

A blind man walks into a bar, grabs his dog by its
hind legs and swings him
around in a circle. The bartender says, "Hey, buddy,
what are you doing?"
And the blind man says, "Don't mind me. I'm just
looking around."

A man walks into a bar looking sad, and the
bartender asks him, "What's the
matter?" The man says, "My wife and I had a fight,
and she told me she
wasn't going to speak to me for a month. The month
is up today."

This guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. He
looks in his pocket and
orders another drink, looks in his pocket and orders
still another drink.
His curiosity aroused, the bartender asks, "What are
you doing? What's in
your pocket?" And the guy says, "It's a picture of
my wife. When she starts
looking good to me, I know it's time to go home."

2007-09-03T00:26:00.000-07:00

Toilet Instructions

Instructions inside a toilet in a company in India. That should give you an indication that many folks in India are unaware of how to use western toilets :-).

If the "Safely Remove Hardware" icon disappears in Windows ...

2007-09-02T23:38:00.001-07:00

Don't panic. Run this command (Start --> Run ):

RunDll32.exe shell32.dll,Control_RunDLL hotplug.dll

Original Article: Safely Remove Hardware: ... Ask Leo!

Lyrics of Chadhta Sooraj

2007-08-20T03:45:00.001-07:00

If you know this qawwali, then there is no need for any explanation.
If you don't know this qawwali, then there is no need for any explanation either :-).

Chadhta Sooraj by Aziz Nazan

hue naamavar ... benishaa.n kaise kaise ...
zamii.n khaa gayii ... naujavaan kaise kaise ...

aaj javaanii par itaraanevaale kal pachhataayegaa - 3
cha.Dhataa sUraj dhiire dhiire Dhalataa hai Dhal jaayegaa - 2
Dhal jaayegaa Dhal jaayegaa - 2

tU yahaa.n musaafir hai ye saraaye faanii hai
chaar roj kii mehamaa.n terii zindagaanii hai
zar zamii.n zar zevar kuchh naa saath jaayegaa
khaalii haath aayaa hai khaalii haath jaayegaa
jaanakar bhii anjaanaa ban rahaa hai diivaane
apanii umr e faanii par tan rahaa hai diivaane
kis kadar tU khoyaa hai is jahaan ke mele me
tu khudaa ko bhuulaa hai pha.nsake is jhamele me
aaj tak ye dekhaa hai paanevaale khotaa hai
zindagii ko jo samajhaa zindagii pe rotaa hai
miTanevaalii duniyaa kaa aitabaar karataa hai
kyaa samajh ke tuu aakhir ise pyaar karataa hai
apanii apanii fikro.n me.n
jo bhii hai vo ulajhaa hai - 2
zindagii haqiikat me.n
kyaa hai kaun samajhaa hai - 2
aaj samajhale ...
aaj samajhale kal ye maukaa haath n tere aayegaa
o gafalat kii nii.nd me.n sonevaale dhokhaa khaayegaa
cha.Dhataa sUraj dhiire dhiire Dhalataa hai Dhal jaayegaa - 2
Dhal jaayegaa Dhal jaayegaa - 2

maut ne zamaane ko ye samaa dikhaa Daalaa
kaise kaise rustam ko khaak me.n milaa Daalaa
yaad rakh sikandar ke hausale to aalii the
jab gayaa thaa duniyaa se dono haath khaalii the
ab naa vo halaakU hai aur naa usake saathii hai.n
ja.ng jo na koras hai aur na usake haathii hai.n
kal jo tanake chalate the apanii shaan-o-shaukat par
shamaa tak nahii jalatii aaj unakii qurabat par
adanaa ho yaa aalaa ho
sabako lauT jaanaa hai - 2
mufhiliso.n kaa andhar kaa
kabr hii Thikaanaa hai - 2
jaisii karanii ...
jaisii karanii vaisii bharanii aaj kiyaa kal paayegaa
sarako uThaakar chalanevaale ek din Thokar khaayegaa
cha.Dhataa sUraj dhiire dhiire Dhalataa hai Dhal jaayegaa - 2
Dhal jaayegaa Dhal jaayegaa - 2

maut sabako aanii hai kaun isase chhuuTaa hai
tU fanaa nahii hogaa ye khayaal jhuuThaa hai
saa.Ns TUTate hii sab rishte TuuT jaaye.nge
baap maa.N bahan biivii bachche chhuuT jaaye.nge
tere jitane hai.n bhaaI vaqatakaa chalan de.nge
chhiinakar terii daulat dohii gaz kafan de.nge
jinako apanaa kahataa hai sab ye tere saathii hai.n
kabr hai terii ma.nzil aur ye baraatii hai.n
laa ke kabr me.n tujhako muradaa bak Daale.nge
apane haatho.nse tere mu.Nh pe khaak Daale.nge
terii saarii ulfat ko khaak me.n milaa de.nge
tere chaahanevaale kal tujhe bhulaa de.nge
is liye ye kahataa huu.n khuub sochale dil me.n
kyuu.N pha.nsaaye baiThaa hai jaan apanii mushkil me.n
kar gunaaho.npe taubaa
aake bas sambhal jaaye.n - 2
dam kaa kyaa bharosaa hai
jaane kab nikal jaaye - 2
muTThii baa.Ndhake aanevaale ...
muTThii baa.Ndhake aanevaale haath pasaare jaayegaa
dhan daulat jaagiir se tuune kyaa paayaa kyaa paayegaa
cha.Dhataa sUraj dhiire dhiire Dhalataa hai Dhal jaayegaa – 4

2007-07-16T05:10:00.001-07:00

[Original]: Article on Himesh Reshammiya

An original article written by yours truly (Amit Shirodkar).

Himesh Reshammiya

TanaHAIyaa!! TanaHAIyaa!! TanaHAIyaa …

These sounds from a passing car assault my ears.. I escape to a coffee shop. “O O OOOO --- Tera mera tera SurOOOOOrr!! OOOOOOOO…” is what they are playing proudly. I go home. Switch on the radio. “Naam hai tera tera – Naam hai TERA TERA!!”. Radio off. TV on. “Jhalak dikhlaja!! Ek baar aa ja aa ja aa ja AAAA JAAA!!”

There is no escape!! He’s everywhere!!

Thoughts swirl in my mind. Is there any place where “Himesh bhai” is not present? Apparently not. A TV set shows him, with the ubiquitous cap perched firmly on his head, his face snarled as if he just drank some castor oil, crooning away. Why does this guy never smile, anyway? I ask a friend (he is a fan of ‘The Cap’ ). “Because his brother died when he was just 11”, replies my buddy. Really? Has Himesh been this obnoxious for so many years now? His parents deserve a gold medal for patience then!! I would recommend them for a medal of valor - a Veer Chakra at least.

A Google search for "Himesh Reshammiya" results in 413,000 hits. Half a million!! Has the whole world gone stark raving mad? "Mohammed Rafi" returns 140,000. Where is the justice? People prefer songs sung by a guy who seems as if he has no mouth and instead has directly connected his vocal chords to his nostrils to those sung by the one and only Rafi?

It all started off so well. Himesh bhai was just giving music – and good music, may I add. The movie was “Pyaar Kiya To Darna Kya”. Nice melodious songs. Pleasing to the ear. Many movies followed. Tere Naam was one such gem. It seemed as if ‘The Cap’ would give many hits. I was happy back then.

And then it happened. “Aashiq Banaya Aapne” was the movie. The title song was sung by Himesh Bhai. At first I said, let’s ignore the nasal sounds – it’s just a one-time thing. It will soon pass …

But no. This was just the calm before the storm. Before you knew it, ‘The Cap’ had gone off and blasted more songs that you could count. And best (or worst) of all – people were loving it!! They could not get enough of him. Hit after hit after hit followed.

As if the sounds were not enough, the eyes were being assaulted too. Cap-filled videos were sprouting all over the place like weeds. And just like weeds, they were very hard to get rid of. (They still exist). So now 2 out of my 5 senses were under a barrage of crappy (I mean cappy) songs.

Just when you thought that the end had come, came another chapter. Himesh bhai acted in a movie.The promos made you feel as if for once, the villain should win!! But alas, that never happens. And so AKS (Aap Ka Suroor) was about to be released. I thought that it would be a flop and so at least this avenue would end in a whimper. Things would go back to normal.

Wrong. Dead wrong. The movie is a hit!! People love him even in this avatar!! Looks like I am one of the few sane ones left on this planet. Stop this world, people, and let me get off!!

I suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune. Thus spake Hamlet, and exactly that is what I feel. What is to be done? What can be done???

Radio on.

TanaHAIyaa!!

I will not react.

TanaHAIyaa!!

I will not respond.

TanaHAIyaa …

Breaking news – there will be a sequel to Aap Ka Suroor.

Billions of blue blistering barnacles!!! Tana%@#$ HAI !#@ yaa %^$% !!!

AJAX / RPC - Prevent IE Caching During Partial Page Updates

2007-07-11T01:53:00.001-07:00

Recently I faced a problem when developing an AJAX application. In Internet Explorer, the request was being cached - a new request would never go to the server in some cases. To prevent this, there is a workaround.

Read more at: AJAX / RPC - Prevent IE Caching During Partial Page Updates

The Ten Most Common Photographic Mistakes

2007-06-19T01:37:00.001-07:00

Nice articles on what mistakes we often make while taking a photo and how to avoid them.

Link: The Ten Most Common Photographic Mistakes

The Best Online Research Apps/Sites You've Never Heard Of

2007-06-18T00:12:00.001-07:00

Great sites for doing research online.

Link: The Best Online Research Apps/Sites You've Never Heard Of

2007-06-17T22:58:00.001-07:00

Presenting dialogues by the one and only Mithun!!

Main hoon Do Numbri, ek se jyaada, teen se kam

Dikhne mein bevda, bhaagne mein ghoda, aur maarne mein hathoda

" Bheegi hui cigarette jal nahi sakti

aur yeh tay hai ki teri maut ki tarikh tal nahi sakti "

"Apun ka naam hai HEERA,

Apun ne sab ko Cheera..."

Mithun da: "mai hun tum jaise logon ki nafarat karne wala, garibon

ke liye jyoti, gundon ke liye jwala"

"tuze banake maut ka niwala, tere sineme gaad dunga mai maut ka bhala. dekh lenga salaa tereko."

Kyunki ab mein Indrajeet nahi......chandaal hoon

Tum chaho toh mera program note karlo

...Tum sab meri diary mein mar chuke ho!

Mein chahoo toh tum sabko abhi mar sakta hoon

Magar abhi maarne se tumhe maarne ka credit meri bullet ko mil jayega!!!!

Mantriji:- "Ye kanch bullretproof hai. tum mujhe chu bhi nahi sakte"

Mithun Da:- "Ye kanch bulletproof hai magar patthhar proof nahi"

AND HE BREAKS IT BY THROWING SMALL STONES ON THE GLASS.

"Mere seene mein itna lava hai...ki sunoge to tumhare kaan ke parde jal jaayenge..

tumhare haathon se hosh ke kabootar ud jaayenge"

"Truck Driver Suraj !! Raasta mera baap aur truck meri maa"

Mithun da is one of the greatest. Koi Shaq???

Favourite Daily Dilberts

2007-06-05T00:02:00.001-07:00

This guy has a good collection of some hilarious Dilbert strips.

Go visit: Favourite Daily Dilbert's

Poetry: W.H. Auden --> Funeral Blues (Stop the Clocks)

2007-06-04T10:17:00.001-07:00

Funeral Blues (Stop the Clocks)

W H Auden

Stop all the clocks, cut off the telephone,

Prevent the dog from barking with a juicy bone,

Silence the pianos and with muffled drum

Bring out the coffin, let the mourners come.

Let the aeroplanes circle moaning overhead

Scribbling on the sky the message He is Dead,

Put crepe bows round the white necks of the public doves,

Let the traffic policemen wear black cotton gloves.

He was my North, my South, my East and West,

My working week and my Sunday rest,

My noon, my midnight, my talk, my song;

I thought that love would last for ever: I was wrong.

The stars are not wanted now: put out every one;

Pack up the moon and dismantle the sun;

Pour away the ocean and sweep up the wood.

For nothing now can ever come to any good.

Programming: Move up a gear with Google Gears

2007-06-03T00:49:00.001-07:00

Google
Gears (BETA) is an open source browser extension that enables web applications
to provide offline functionality using following JavaScript
APIs:

Ø      
Store and serve application resources
locally

Ø      
Store data locally in a fully-searchable
relational database

Ø      
Run asynchronous Javascript to improve
application responsiveness

2007-06-01T01:54:00.000-07:00

[Original] Poetry in Symantec, India

Some poetry that I and a few other folks wrote in Symantec, India as part of an email thread.

Original Post: Anshuman Atre

Hi,

Sorry for the group-wide spam,
I wouldn't have, but for my current jam!

I need someone to please free,
This particular static IP..

It goes 10.212.97.233..
And believe me, its not at all free!

All my work has got cut shorted,
And my downloads; they've aborted!

So whoever's using it, kindly see,
Don't "borrow" the IP that's been assigned to me!

Rgds,
Atre

Follow Up 1: Udipta Das
Twas my lappy
Who sent ur IP swappy.
And 'coz my lappy
Just *uses* DHCP ....

Why IS&T dear
Has set your IP free?
I know not, but I fear
IS&T should hear some poetry

- U Das

Follow Up 2: Hetal Rach
Can't resist the temptation to re-send the response that I'd sent to
Anshuman in September 2006 :-)

I checked my IP Address today, for a change
And also to figure out what was the DHCP range..

10.212.97.232 address is what I got
And it comes to me via the DHCP lot

When you use 10.212.97.233 address as static one
Are you sure that it is yours and can be claimed by none ?

hetal.

Follow Up 3: Me (Amit Shirodkar)
On Anshuman's travails I have to comment
Because things are not going well for him like he meant

All he tried to do was a Siebel download
But in return he got troubles by the truckload

After starting the download in the night
He came in next day all cheerful and bright

What he saw shook him to the core
He looked at the screen aghast
All his data was torn as if by a blast
"Oh no - my Siebel!!" he cried, "My Sap!!"
All ripped asunder by a mighty zap
He thought he heard a voice say
"You will see your data nevermore!!"

"Where is my data???" he roared
"In which deep dungeon is it stored???"

His productivity is not at all well
His feelings about the IT folks will land him in jail
He says aloud "What can I do, please do tell"
"Abort, Retry, Ignore or Fail???"

-- Amit Shirodkar

2007-05-31T22:21:00.001-07:00

Some good blogs ...

Some good blogs found on the net:

Scott Adams Blog: http://dilbertblog.typepad.com/
Dave Barry Blog: www.davebarry.com

Below are popular blogs by people of Indian origin:

Great Bong's Blog (this is the best known blog by a person of Indian origin): www.greatbong.net
Blog of any IIM Calcutta Alumnus (humor blog): www.mydayzwithmyself.blogspot.com
Blog of a female NRI software professional (humor blog): www.meghalomania.com

2007-05-31T05:28:00.001-07:00

Brilliant piece of writing. Some strong language, but very well written.

Long, but definitely worth reading.

Link: Inside the Monkeysphere